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9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Red


I have been busy keeping busy too. Today was a fine day, I actually accomplished lots considering I'm anemic. I have to go to town tomorrow to get my winter tires changed to summer. I'll get two more bales of peat moss at the same time. Spread one in the little green house and I will spread another tomorrow and till it in. Then I'm done with green houses for a while. It pleases me to see you sounding so happy.  Happy quilting.

Davit
9 years ago 0 2508 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I have been busy keeping busy and Finally found a quilt block that interests me to work on. On the web site of the gourmet quilter out of New Zealand. "The floating four patch" as it is called is simply delicious. As she puts it. Its great to have a positive project to occupie my mind and hands with again and I just love her teaching style and sense of humor. She takes her sewing machine and fabric with heer every where she goes and on holiday as she puts it and get this Davit how's this for OCD. She took to quilting with her machine on top of their small house boat while on holiday. Now how's that for adventurous and stepping outside of the box my friend. No pun intended!! Boxes, squares, triangles, etc. Creating quilts out of little blocks of fabric that is :o) Red...
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
A small piece of clarification. The carbohydrate causes a temporary insulin spike and the carriers must in some way be insulin sensitive to be affected by insulin and Tryptophan's must not be because it is the only one not affected by the insulin spike. The information on the internet did not say what the carriers were made of only that they were necessary to cross the barrier into the brain. 

Davit
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hugs, to the best of my knowledge there are no tests to tell if it is depression or lack of drive. I'm pretty sure they both come from the same area. Low Seratonin levels. A little known fact is that 95% of Seratonin is built, stored and used in the body. The other 5% is built in the brain. It can not cross the blood brain barrier so has to be built there. It is built from Tryptophan, one of the eight essential amino acids. Which unfortunately compete with it for absorption. And usually win because of how we eat. Not what we eat. The body needs Seratonin for every message so that dragged out not interested feeling could be either. SSRIs don't build Seratonin they prevent it's loss. You have to have it first. If you can run on your treadmill and feel coordinated with each step but just don't feel like doing it then you probably have enough in your body but not enough in your brain. A study on the internet said to reduce the competition so more tryptophan gets to your brain you have to have a carbohydrate with every tryptophan bearing protein. Insulin strips the carrier from the other seven amino acids but not from Tryptophan So tryptophan can reach the brain and get converted to Seratonin. Pasta is a better source of carbohydrate than sugar, bread better than both. Milk, high in tryptophan has a built in carbohydrate. Heating milk releases more tryptophan. Granny wasn't wrong about hot milk calming.  By itself is good but with oats, say as cheerios it is better. Eggs have tryptophan as does cheese, but a cheese omelette is worthless without a piece of toast too. Seratonin also helps prevent obesity. Eating right makes it easier to use those amino acids for energy and harder to store. Another reason to feel depressed or have no interest. Exercise uses the other essential amino acids, allowing tryptophan to do it's job. My favourite salad, a chefs salad should have croutons or grapes added. Without them and with a calorie wise dressing you are actually asking your body to store it as fat. So don't blame the salad for not giving you energy. And don't blame bread for making you fat. It is what you eat with it.
Just like potatoes. Another food blamed for weight gain. Milk and potatoes contain all the amino acids, balanced too. Boiled and mashed with milk is better than baked with butter. The only thing wrong with a fully loaded potato is volume. Calories are still calories and too many are not good. 
Most people who work in the bush carry a couple of Eat More bars. Peanuts a good source of protein and Tryptophan along with the molasses and sugars is a balance that works. Dextrose is a usable sugar for energy where sucrose is not.
Taking Tryptophan as a supplement doesn't work without a carbohydrate with it. Often it is not that you need glycogens to fuel the muscles but Seratonin so the messages can get to the muscles telling them to use the glycogens. 

I guess I rambled on, but by watching what I'm eating to keep it balanced has given me back interest. I just don't have much body left I can use.

Davit. 
9 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Davit, How do I tell if my lost desire is depression or just changing values? You seem to have a great deal of passion, but I'm lacking this. I could cut myself some slack, since I lost a dear parent, and wonderful person, and the circumstances were stressful. I'd like flip a switch on the one hand, and turn on some enthusiasm for life, but the void is so large! I tried a fitness class at my gym of 30 years, but it's not the same as 20 years ago...I just don't don't seem to feel "passion" I guess I could take the online test too.
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I have spent the last two days spreading 300 pounds of peat moss in my bigger greenhouse and mixing it in with an electric tiller. It was a chore but I'm pleased, now I have to saturate it because the soil is so dry. There was a time when this would not have been such a chore. And I might have enjoyed it more. Once plants are out there I will have to keep a fire going and electric heat for back up. If it gets real cold as it can I will have to feed the fire in the night. That is just how it is as is watering it every day and twice when it is hot. I bought extra seaweed fertilizer incase I need it this year. I intend to have nice cantaloupe and watermelon as I used to years ago when I was not so crippled. This is why I'm starting a month early. We have to do what we have to do. CBT has allowed me to put this have to into the realm of want to if that can make sense. Some would say it borders on OCD. Not so but I must admit close. I enjoy the gardens and green houses, the flowers and the fruit just not all the work some times. A hand full of fresh strawberries can make it all worth while. Knowing it is all organic and safe is an even better reason. 

Davit
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
As life would have it I have to go back to town monday for blood tests. And if they are out of whack, back again to discuss results. Something I will just do. I missed the last call for blood work today by five minutes and it wasn't my fault. Am I upset, yes but what good would that do. Like rain, life happens. I can always find a reason for rain.

Davit
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
It's Friday, for some of you the weekend is coming up. Are you looking forward to it, if panic doesn't screw it up. If the change from routine doesn't screw it up. For some of you the last five days have been safe, you know what you have to do and did it, going home every night and thinking I made it. Unless like I was you are on call. For some of you tomorrow will be your only free day. Sunday you will start to worry. Monday morning you will be awake long before you have to be. You will drag yourself off to work wondering if you look as bad as you feel. Wondering if it shows. 
Well this is no way to live is it. There are some of you who have been living this way so long it feels like it belongs. It certainly does not. Why should it, your brain is built the same as the next persons. It just doesn't have the same information in it. It works the same way as the next persons, it just comes up with different answers because it has different information stored in it. Good thing or we might as well be clones. The only part you want to change is how you see your specific triggers. Do that and you are on the road to recovery. How long you make that road is up to you. Mine was long and painful with lots of dead ends before CBT. After that it was much faster till now I live as normal of a life as possible. 
Why am I babbling, because I want to remind you that you can be panic free. Just in case you start thinking you are wasting your time. 
Now I am off to the Doctors, then the store for more peat moss, the library and finally the grocery store. There was a time when this would have been very difficult. Oh and I have to go to the pharmacy too. I'd rather not spend my afternoon this way but I can, and that is a good feeling. Might even meet some people I know and not hide from them.

Davit
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sometimes I have to push to stay on track. I did finish the big flower bed in front of the house. I pulled out an invasive plant and will plant it where it doesn't matter.
It is going to snow tonight but will melt and then snow or rain some more. It doesn't matter because I'm going to work in the big green house and it has a stove in it. I'm going to spread some manure and peat moss and till it under to loosen the soil that has slowly been losing it's organic material. Going to mix up some sea weed fertilizer too for the plants I'm starting in the kitchen. Starter soil already has bone meal in it to make strong roots. I wish I had an awning over my deck. It is too wet to rake the lawn even though it is bare. Ground under it is still frozen. Tomorrows snow or rain won't help even though the temp will be high enough to melt more snow. It will be days before I can get on the strawberry patch and weeks before I can till the gardens. I don't plant out there till the middle of may. Plants I set out there don't get started till the middle of april. Green house plants can be started April first. That isn't that far away. Staying busy keeps the anxiety away once I get started. Every year I wonder how I'm going to do it. And every year I just do it. This year I need to buy soaker hose for the strawberries because the area beside it won't get watered as it will be summer fallow. Every year gets drier and I don't expect this year to be any different. It could be though. It could be wet with lots of mosquitoes. I won't think about it and will deal with it if it is.
Geese were noisy this morning. They are fighting over a pond they don't nest in anyway. Well it all makes life interesting. I still get excited watching things grow even though I've been doing it for half a century. If it isn't too wet tomorrow I'll take the chains off the tractor. A lot easier to take off than put on.
I hope since no one is here that everyone is doing okay. 

Davit
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Birds don't have computers. They don't know it isn't spring yet. Geese came back today. And one robin. Daffodils  and Tulips are sticking out. Some of the perennials are trying too. It was a real nice day. 
I cleaned and spread peat moss on one flower bed today despite starting off very sore. Can't tell if the roses survived.

Perogy for supper and then light the fire to keep the seeds I started warm. Some leek seed has sprouted. Lemon grass will probably be next or tomatoes. 

There are muddy cat tracks on my car. Right across the drivers side of the windshield. 

I have Tinnitus (ringing ears) from the morphine. It will go. Starting to get sore again as it wears off. Today I hard boiled some eggs in case I'm too sore again tomorrow. Cooked two sausages too. This morning about all I could do was get a bowl of cereal and a cup of tea. Too sore even to make coffee. 

Mentally it was a good day. They usually are now. Even getting along with my brother. Looking forward to finishing the other half of that flower bed.

David

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