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13 years ago 0 517 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Sim, 
I wish there was a lake near by... it sucks because I live by the city... there is hardly much nature around here. 
 
I have been doing better, just that I pulled a muscle and then I have some chest discomfort from last night. It is bothering me and scaring me but I'm trying to tell myself it is nothing. I've also started a new art project and I am very excited about that. I'm trying to focus on that when I feel depressed and it makes me feel better.
13 years ago 0 124 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello Davit,
 
Thank you for sharing with me about your candle sticks and perfectionism. It is wonderful that you let the wood dictate what you can get out of it. I find that ugly things often have character (and usually a story to go with them too)!
 
Anerol, It sounds like you are doing well today! Those mornings can really soothe the soul, there is nothing more peaceful than morning (especially if you are near water, the calmness of a lake in the morning is one of my favourite things in the world)!
I'm glad you painted too...:)
 
 

13 years ago 0 517 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi SIM, thanks for letting me know you understand too. it's nice to be reassured that this is 'normal'. Today is a new day, and i have changed my thinking about it. I feel like I'd like to see how much I can get out of it.... as like another practice and experience. It's too bad that it almost took the whole day for me to stop dwelling on it, but today, I feel fine. I actually did try to sleep early and went outside in the morning to take my walk and I felt happy and refreshed. I love the morning and it's amazing how much it boosts my mood if I wake up early. I painted today too and it was theraputic. I was still a perfectionist but I'm proud of how it turned out.
 
Hi Davit, 
Thanks for the quote, but it would work for me better if you change the wrong and the right
"Remember if you could never be right how could you be sure you were wrong."

13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I make candle sticks, but never make them in pairs because of my perfectionism. Now I actually like to let what is in the wood dictate what I can get out of it. And some times it is pretty ugly. Some times it is unique. I've learned to laugh at what I get and then burn it. No more forcing myself. I have a truck commissioned, I don't do this because of the pressure, but I know I am good so that what ever turns out it will be fine, Maybe not perfect but certainly better than not doing it at all and who knows I may do something exquisite and since I don't have to copy it, it may well be. I used to have a lot of trouble with the phone but that seems to have passed. I think because most phone stuff can be done by computer also so if I screw up on the phone I can always correct it on the computer. Anyway the phone has become not such a big deal anymore.

Remember if you could never be wrong how could you be sure you were right.

We ARE all in this together.

Davit.
13 years ago 0 124 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi anerol,
 
I just read through this thread and I can totally relate on the whole phone situation and being a perfectionist and getting frustrated. When stuff like this happens to me it tends to manage to ruin the remainder of my day, I will constantly be replaying it in my mind and dwelling on it. And frankly, I've just recently noticed how hard I am on myself. I've recently decided to try to not dwell on things for more than a few minutes (30minutes tops). Instead I have been trying to think of these "mistakes" or "shortcomings" as a learning on experience and a lesson to use in the future. If I can learn from these situations and no one is hurt in the process then it's not worth ruining the rest of my day by crying and hiding from the world. Some days I am more motivated than others...but I am trying..and every day things become more clear to me...
 
We are all rooting for each other, we are all in this together.
 
SIM 
13 years ago 0 517 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Sunny,
I actually took a little nap after that and felt a little 'renewed' so I forced myself to go to the library. I was able to go. I'm glad I was able to. I still feel some blah though. I think I will go exercise after this and sleep early so I can wake up early to go take a walk during sunrise.
I'm glad you know what I'm talking about and I guess, a lot of people do it too, about the phone thing. I would have called back but it took over 10 min. to wait to actually talk to someone so considering that, I didn't want to. And then I end up getting mad at the system. Oh well. I'm starting to forget about it so that's good. As much as I love to paint, it is stressful to me at times because again of my perfectionism. Also, I can't work when specific people are home. Thanks for rooting for me, that is my motivation.  

13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Anerol:  It's o.k. to feel down once in awhile and pamper yourself for a day or so.  Hoping it doesn't last too long for you.  I have those feelings too, of perfectionism, and after a phone call start to think why didn't I say such and such.  I try to do something else afterwards to get my mind off it because I know worrying about it doesn't change anything.  It actually happened to me today too, it was an answering machine and I got all tongue tied because I wasn't expecting it. We know that this is difficult to do, but I really hope you try to focus on something positive afterwards.  Have you ever tried art therapy?  It's really quite interesting.  I don't know much about it but have seen it advertized.  I really want to take the course but it is close to $500 and I'll have to save up for it.  Since you enjoy painting, sketching, try and put your feelings of the moment on paper/canvas.  Just for fun. remember when I started some clay work this winter?  A couple of days I slapped some clay around without any idea of what I was going to do with it.  It was fun anyway. Cheering for you. 
p.s. if I feel agitated and can't focus as well as I would want to, I jot down the main things I have to remember and have it by the phone when I call.  Just an idea for you. I needed that this morning - lol.
13 years ago 0 517 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Sunny, thanks for the tips.
I will try it out once I am in the mood. I am pretty depressed today. I had to call something for someone and I forgot to ask a few questions that I should have and I can't stop being obsessed about it. I'm such a perfectionist. I keep telling myself, why can't i this and that. So then i didn't even want to go to the bank and i still have to take care of something from the bank. But I don't want to do it. I don't even want to go to the library and i just want to stay inside my bed. Everything is bothering me now and i am annoyed with everything.

13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Anerol:  If you like physical exercise perhaps the muscle relaxation technique would be good for you.  I find that when I just can't concentrate on the visualization, I do the muscle exercise first.  Practice it for at least a week and see if you like it.  If you can't do the breathing exercise, just take three deep breaths before every technique.  I have found that doing that each and every time, it works as a signal to my body that it's relaxation time.  
13 years ago 0 517 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Davit,
yes, I do yoga and aerobics daily and they help me tons.. but I was wondering what i can do during an anxiety. i know breathing is supposed to work, but i am still having trouble with it when i am in it. 


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