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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Feelings of unreality

Lucid_Dream:

Thank-you so much for your description of what I feel on an almost daily basis, you see I have chronic sinusitis. I thought the spacey feeling might have something to do with my sinuses but at times I tell myself I might end up in a psych ward because of the weird feeling.

I can't remember what the doctors told me, I have either 2 under developed or 2 sinuses that are not developed. They told me my sinuses are about the width of a pencil, not good. I find what helps alleviate the feeling is steaming, boil some water, put it in a basin with a towel over my head & breathe in the steam.

I think daily steaming is in order for me.

Thanks again

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

waking with panic

Hi Ya Joe67:

Let me start out by saying it's not hopeless as I too have been there. I used to have 5 - 6 pa's a day and wake up at night with pa's. I was frightened from everything and anything, the clouds going in front of the sun, my basement, taking a shower, thunderstorms.

My panic disorder was severe, but I mastered the disorder using CBT. There are a lot of caring people on this site who will help you through as they did me. In times of utter despair they comforted me because they have been through it.

You can overcome this, it takes hard work but it all pays off in the end.

Take care

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Challenging thoughts of being crazy

Hi Ya dawuad10:

I too have been there, thinking I was going crazy. You know what after all I have been through 5 - 6 panic attacks per day, afraid from everything and anything, depersonalization. I eventually mastered my Panic Disorder & with hard work and perseverance you can too.

My one piece of advice because I did the same thing as you stop reading so much about anxiety and panic. I kept reading, researching , looking for that magic cure, the one thing that would make everything ok. I kept thinking it was someone or something, a book, but I was the only person who could ultimately help me with the guidance of my psychotherapist. With too much reading you can take on other peoples issues, symptoms. You end up saying what if this happens to me, everyone one is individual in their symptoms & the way they respond to them.

Instead try to focus on recovery because it is possible. Make use of the forums as there are a lot of people who are/have gone through similar experiences and know just where you are coming from. I know there have been many times when I was in the depth of despair & posted on the forum, only to find comforting words from other sufferers or the moderators.

During my battle & subsequent recovery of Panic Disorder I was able to back to school in over 30 years, receive an A- in college english, teach myself PowerPoint and receive 100% on my presentation, completed a work placement & so much more.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Managing Anxiety

Hi Ya:

I know this thread was started last year but I was just looking through the forums and thought this sounds like me.

I have both anxiety and depression, it seems like a vicious circle. I get anxious, agitated and then get depressed over the anxiety and agitation. Right now it's the agitation that's the worst, it seems everything annoys me from day to night. It's wearing me out.

I get agitated a lot these days with thoughtless people who ride their bikes on the sidewalk when we are trying to walk, cars who don't stop at the crosswalk, people who don't have the common decency when walking to move aside to let other people by, women with strollers who are always in a hurry and rushing by.

The other night I had an awful bought of itching all over, it was unreal. It was like an attack of some kind, I was restless into the bargain and didn't know what the heck was going on with me. My thoughts weren't making any sense and racing around all over the place. It was very frightening. The next night I was anxious in case the same would happen again, it did only not as intense. I have read that the symptoms could be due to stress as well as other medical causes.

I can't seem to be at peace - mentally.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Topic: Rebuilding Your Self-Esteem (continued)

Hi Ya All:

Haven't been here in quite a while but the topic got my attention.

Never did have much self-esteem but since PD, 4 bouts of Depression, GAD, Rosacea, not being able to work in 5 years I have very little self-esteem left. I hardly ever give myself for lack of a better word "praise" for all the things I have been able to accomplish while in the midst of all this emotional turmoil because I cannot move forward in the direction I want.

The direction I want to move in is re-integration into the workforce, part-time in Accounting. I see myself as a failure, having defects because I seems to be stuck in the loops of GAD & Depression. I never cut myself any slack.

Take for instance tonight while at dinner I felt as if my hands/arms didn't belong to me, I thought I was going mad. So I came to the site desperately searching for any posts on detached feeling/depersonalization & quickly scanned through Dr. Weekes book "Essential Help For Your Nerves".

How does one re-build something that was so fragile to begin with?

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Topic: Rebuilding Your Self-Esteem (continued)

Hi Ya Davit;

Thank you so much for taking time out to respond & offer words of encouragement.

Am I good at my work?

I am very good at what I do

Do I have the social skills to be in the work force?

I have been volunteering for the past year but have never participated in any meetings, requests to go to lunch, attended the Christmas party. I tend to stay on my own.

Can I deal with people, even on a part time basis?

Not sure about this one as I tend to have a very low tolerance threshold these days.

You're correct about using the word never, let me re-phrase that to very little. What I really appreciated most about your post was "Why not start over anew and build instead of rebuild if you don't want to build on something fragile." I never really thought of it that way, the focus is more on the present not the past which is a big part of the problem.

I did find the following inspirational phrase which I thought you would appreciate as it pertains to the above.

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new beginning”.

Carl Bard

Take Care

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Topic: Rebuilding Your Self-Esteem (continued)

Thank-you Davit, you brought a smile to my face.

Now if I could only find a little faith in myself & build on it.

I was reading through some of the other posts, I hope you are feeling better.

You are a continued source of inspiration to people on this site

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

update, some sad news

My heart goes out to Davit as he has helped so many on this site including myself. I wish him strength & peace of mind during this trying time.

I am very saddened by the news. It's good to know he has sunny to be with him as we all need someone.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Hi Ya

My name is Carol and I have been suffering from depression since Dec/07. I have not been working since Jan/07 because I also had Panic Disorder (although I'm beginning to think you never really get rid of it because I have started getting panic attacks again).

I am not on any meds because I have read so much about the possible side affects that they terrify me. I did attend a GP psychotherapist here in Toronto from Mar/07 to May/08 for treatment of the Panic Disorder, Depression and I forgot to mention GAD. The psychotherapist had me on a roller coaster ride emotionally, one week he would tell me that if it takes a year he will help me to get through the depression, the next week he would tell me there was nothing more he could do for me, another week it was he doesn't see me getting out of the depression if I don't get back to work. Every week I would get into another tailspin so I finally decided to find another therapist because I couldn't take the roller coaster anymore.

At times the depression is so overwhelming I feel as if I am going to lose it, other times I just don't want to wake up in the morning and am mad when I do. I get mood swings, sometimes I don't feel like talking at all, other times I am so agitated and yet others I am so down I don't know how I am going to go on. But somehow I do.

The next week is going to be very challenging for me because I am scheduled for surgery & don't know how I am going to handle being in hospital for 2 days and recuperation for a month. You see with the Panic Disorder one of my biggest fears was not being able to get out.

Nothing seems to lift me out of what I call profound sadness & if I find something that does it doesn't last for long.

Well that's my story.

Hope to hear from someone.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 180

Hi Ya

Hi Patrick:

Thank-you for your reply. I am not on any medication because I have read so much about the possible side affects that they frighten the wits out of me. I have not tried the program yet but intend to.

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