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15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

Car Crash

Thanks again. I am feeling much better for the moment. Tomorrow will be better. These days I move through obsessions very quickly. It helps at least that when I begin to stress about some irrational thought that these days I knock them right out of the park within a couple of days. Better than the early phase where I would obsess about something for weeks. Sure the driving will be the same.

Wow this forum is great.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

Car Crash

Don't think I have ever measured my BP as high as it was last night. But I am doing great today. I feel really tired because I couln't sleep but amazingly I haven't let it affect me. Normally after a scary experience like a panic attack the experience triggers a period of generalised anxiety. Today I feel fine.

Progress!!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

Panic resurfacing

Welcome kdawg. It can be very scary worrying about health when you know all the things that can go wrong! I am in medical science so I know my fair share about the human body. But I am not a doctor so with me it's the whole "a little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing".

One eventually learns how to not obsess over health problems. Whenever possible it helps not to avoid situations that cause you anxiety. The fact that you care enough about others that you experience so much anxiety should remind you of what a great person you are! Sure you will feel better. Good luck.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

What is fear?

Hi CM

I think what you are describing is basically panic disorder in a nutshell. Fear of fear. Its the constant worrying about the next panic attack and the fear afterwards that gets me too. I don't even mind the physical sensations of a panic attack anymore just the constant anxiety. I feel the same way as you do. I also feel sick of the constant fear. But most activities aren't as scary as we perceive them to be.

I feel the same way about driving in heavy traffic. Last week Friday I was in a car crash. At the time I freaked out because I was just starting to feel better about driving and so I felt that life and "Murphy" were giving me a really unfair challenge. I spent the whole weekend stressing about the week to come and about having to drive. But I have managed to get back and forth to work everyday this week and I feel great for it. The reality of my driving experience was no way near as bad as what my expectations of it were. I found listening to music to sing along to helped me alot . So what if my singing is false and I look like an idiot!

If I can give any advice whilst I too am stuck in this cycle of terror (my 2 cents worth), then it is to try your best not too avoid situations that cause fear. Don't miss that opportunity to do the course you want to do as this will only leave you with regret and even more fear.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

A bit discouraged at the moment...

Hi Miki

We all feel that way some days! Just remember the progress you have up until this point. You must have had good days where you experienced less anxiety than usual. I always feel the worst by far when I am depressed as well as anxious. Just remember that you deserve to get better! Today is a good day for me. We must remember the better days! And on the bad days just vent away.

Good luck.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

Headaches and irrational thoughts

Just for everybodies info. This months edition of Nature Genetics has an article about how they are finally finding the genetic causes of schizophrenia.

This was a difficult obsessional and irrational thought for me to get over. The thought of going mad and losing control of your thoughts can be very scary. Well, it seems that unless you have the biological predisposition for schizophrenia it is impossible for you to develop it. No matter how stressed you are or how high your anxiety levels are. Psychology textbooks use the words "stress" or "environmental stress" as reasons for developing schizophrenia. However, the most important "stress" factors are related to brain damage during the feotal development and possibly oxygen starvation during birth.

So we cannot stress ourselves to madness!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

A bit discouraged at the moment...

This forum just goes to show that some people really do care about others. Sometimes people in our lives who have not experienced real panic can be patronising. But in reality our loved ones do care. They just don't understand.

At least here we have the opportunity to relate to one another.

I am seeing a therapist. The human touch does help. It also helps alot with irrational thought when somebody else can affirm that they are indeed irrational.

Don't downplay your accomplishments. Doing anything with fear is not easy. It makes you brave for facing your fear.

My wife is also depressed. It makes it so difficult to deal with the anxiety when your spouse is also dealing with problems. Couples feed off each others problems. You really can't force somebody else to be happy. Let him know that you care and that's about all you can do.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

Headaches and irrational thoughts

Hi Jhori

I do believe that knowledge is power. When my mind is in a good state I certainly interpret articles very positively. Making sense of journal articles is something I do all day but it goes with the territory. I am hoping to publish my first article soon. When you are in a bad place you look at things with "fear goggles". I tend to end up focusing on the one in a million chance of some catastrophe happening instead of the high probability that something good will happen. But I'm getting better.

When I was really worrying about the "madness" issue I also read another article where they found other genetic loci involved in schizophrenia. The authors also compared the loci with the development of panic disorder, depression and bipolar disorder and found NO correlation whatsoever.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

What is fear?

Great post jhori82

I just went through a fearful situation and I don't feel like facing it again but I think after reading your post that I will go do the activity that made me panic and face it again!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

My cat.

Hi Diva

Work and school can be tough. My first panic attack happened soon after I signed up for a new job while also trying to finish my Master's Degree. I really didn't want to take the job. But the money was good and everybody was telling me about what great experience I would be getting. I felt trapped as the job was for an 8 month contract as a lecturer and my previous experience of lecturing was awful. I then had my first PA. The anxiety got much worse and I thought I cannot do this for eight months. I had to lecture at night, sometimes until 11 and this is in central Johannesburg- the crime capital of the world!

But when I began to lecture I really enjoyed it. Before I began fear of taking on all the responsibility again was intense but now I feel great about it. I only have a few more months to lecture and it really isn't one tenth as scary as thought it would be. I feel now like I have changed my entire perspective of lecturing and it no longer holds any trepidation for me. My Master's is also going ok and I can handle doing both at the same time.

Very few experiences are nearly a bad as perceive them to be. We can handle allot more than we give ourselves credit for. Our perceptions define how we experience everything in life. I am reminded of a tale told of the Buddha:

He was once walking with his disciples and they came across a dead and decaying dog. He began to weep. His students asked if they should remove the animal as they thought it had offended him. He then explained why he was crying. He was crying because he saw how beautiful the pearl colour of the dog's teeth were which brought him such joy that he was moved to tears.

Sorry to hear about your cat. My family have also lost two cats in the last month due to old age.

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