miss y´all; crying over nothing at all
Hi Goofy,
"No matter how hard I try to figure out the underlying cause or emotions or thought, I can't figure it out."
Me too!
" There's not an answer....I am and I have to accept it."
I agree. This fits me too. I just accept it and move on. I tried ignoring it for over a year, and that didn't work, so now I am on meds and getting additional help which is working a bit. I think some people think "accepting it" means pretending nothing is wrong and ignoring the problem. For me, it means acknowledging the problem and doing something about it.
I know exactly what you mean about side effects. Last month I had so many that I felt the bad depression was better, and I was ready to give up meds altogether. I complained to the doc and he changed the meds. I am only on 25 mg of Lamictal (a very, very low dose) and it is enough to stop the crying the help with the depression. So far, because of the low dose, I have no side effects. I am scared to go higher!
I wish I could fight this without meds, but so far the meds have been the most effective thing. I am sure each person is different and may find that talk therapy or exercise or a diet change is all that it takes to change their mood. I kept trying all those things and more the past year, but to no avail.
I sure wish I knew why we do that random crying. So if the random crying is about the "Subconscious attempt[ing] to avoid the real emotion," then how do we figure out what those "real emotions" are? It seems a great mystery to me.
I think, for some people, their depression might be related to feelings about negative life situations or events, but I think for me, the depression is more chemical in nature. I am imagining/guessing that if your depression is related to a life situation or event (and less of a pure chemical issue), then the activities here at the depression center, talk therapy, and more may make a huge difference and meds may be needed only minimally if at all. However, if your depression is more chemically based, independent of life situations or events, then I am guessing/theorizing that meds may be your first line of defense.
For me, I have no negative life events or situations to explain the sever depression, and after much research and asking around, I got my family to reveal that my father and older sister are bipolar and my older brother suffers from MDD. Since they never mentioned it before, I had no idea. The stigma behind mental health issues prevented me from learning important info that I needed. So based on my personal situation, I have a strong suspicion that I am fighting a genetically inherited chemical issue. My doc diagnosed me as bipolar II, so this probably means meds are best for me (plus other helpful things).
I just wanted to say all of that so you knew that I wasn't just advocating doping up on meds. I definitely agree with the idea that each person's depression is so unique to them, and they need to work with their doctor to evaluate which course of action would be the best.
Even though I will be sort of med dependent for the long-term (due to the bipolar issues), I firmly believe in doing everything to help myself, which is why I am here at the depression center. I am on the goals section now and fining it helpful. I hope, wherever you are in the program, you are finding much success too!
