Okay do you see now why your psychiatrist wants you just to learn coping skills and not why. Too much information is only part of it. Your core beliefs are already fighting you. It happens to all of us.
Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Well I'm from pluto. I am different from most of the people I know. But I still like me. I didn't always. I had core beliefs that said I was ugly. I had core beliefs that said I was stupid. And I had core beliefs that said I could never be loved. All of them wrong.
There are things I'm still working on. There are things I may never change and there are some pretty powerful ones I don't like. I'm about 80% satisfied and I'm told that is pretty good for some one with a panic disorder.
I like my determination, I like my compassion, I like the way I live even though it is different. I like my skills.
This is why you have to challenge them.
I'm going to take a chance of you getting mad and leaving because I think you really do want to get better.
I see things you do like about yourself but there is so much negative that you are blinded. Take each one of these things you like and reinforce them with things that prove it. Core beliefs deal with the overall, they throw an umbrella over everything so it is hard to deal with single things. Negative breeds negative, positive breeds positive.
My brother has an anger disorder and a core belief that he is perfect so he can never deal with it. He will never believe it even though it crops up at least once a day. Core beliefs blind you.
I'm physically disabled. Disabilities go hand in hand with anxiety, panic and depression. Pain makes it worse. The hardest thing I had to deal with was people holding doors for me.
You will be amazed at how much different the world looks if you take the things you like and reinforce them. Beware of the negative in memory that tries to stop you from doing this. If this was a live group we would insist you tell us the things you like about yourself and we would shoot you down every time your memory brought up a negative.
CBT works but you have to work it.
This is only 10 posts, there are people still reinforcing liking themselves after hundreds but they are getting there and are happy with their success. There are people who know it is a battle but are fighting it anyway because the work sheets show their gains and where they need work. Tell me in a month that you are not making progress because I won't believe it. Just the fact you are still here says a lot. Tell your core beliefs where to go and prove them wrong, they are you know.
I have a saying. "CBT is the hardest simple thing you will ever do". A friend from here quotes that every time she starts to slip. I should Email her and see how she is. She is an amazing success storey.
The problem with success is that people leave so you can never count how many there are. There are only a few I get to check on. I wish they would all come back and scream I won.
Steven, if you were a normal healthy person you would not be here, none of us would. Accept today as a set back and right it down but also right down "I am trying" Always end on a positive note.
You know I didn't kill your chances nor did the statement, it is just words. Your interpretation based on your core beliefs is trying to kill your ability. Don't let it. You can do this.
Again start with one thing you like about you and reinforce it. I'm talking about what you like, not what others like, they are not the ones that have to do this exercise.
There is a thing called association where a negative thought will transfer to another thought just because it is associated even remotely. But the same happens with positive thoughts.
Do you know what a bell curve is?