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And He Coughs Part II

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And He Coughs Part II

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1073

Hey Lady, How are you holding up? ~huggs~ and the kids? I've been debating for days how to respond to this thread. All I can do is draw from my own experience. I have not, nor do I think I will ever be, the stereotypical ex-smoker. Even though you and I have both quit, the person I keep empathizing (not sympathizing! :) )with in this is your dad. My husband had to (okay, chose to) stand by me through my quitting what felt like zillions of times. He was patient, very patient. He bought me NRT's, made middle of the night runs for suckers, candy and sunflower seeds. He solidly encouraged me in every quit attempt and never made me feel like he didn't think I could do it. He held me when I was crying and steered clear of me when I was angry. And he tried so hard not to show his disappointment every time I failed! He knew I was miserable when I didn't succeed and he didn't want to make it worse. During the last couple of quit attempts I know he was just as scared as me that not quitting would cost me my life. And still he was supportive. If he had ever given me a hard time, I would have thrown it back at him. If he gave me too much information on the dangers of smoking, I would have gone on a tirade (kind of like when the kids came home after drug awareness week at school! :blush: ). If he had given me an ultimatum, I probably would have left. In my addiction, I would have told myself it was because he was trying to run my life and not accepting me as I was. I would have given up the love of my life, the most wonderful person I know. Because I am an addict. I guess what I'm saying is, just love your dad. He already knows you want him to quit. Celebrate his acheivements, downplay your disappointments. Just like with our kids...we celebrate those A's and we help them study harder when they get a C or less. We never berate them for not succeeding....(although they do get a pretty good lecture when they don't even try!) Just love him... [color=Purple]~bugg huggs~[/color] [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 361 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 19,135 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2382.6 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 35 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 2 [B]Seconds:[/B] 3

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$56,745.00

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Days: 1004 Hours: 0

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7566

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189,150

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19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1073

coming in a little late here, but wanted to let you know I think this is grand! take the lead from him on how much to celebrate. ~huggs~ and I'll say a lil prayer too. [color=Purple]~lbugg~[/color] [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 351 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 18,649 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2316.6 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 34 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 36 [B]Seconds:[/B] 46

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$56,745.00

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Days: 1004 Hours: 0

Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

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7566

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189,150

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19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1073

remember...hold him when he cries and steer clear of him when he's angry! ~hugs~ know that what he's going through is tougher than what you're going through...and it gets better! ~prayers for your kids...grumpy adult round 2!~ [color=Purple]~lbugg~[/color] [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 367 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 19,484 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2422.2 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 35 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 24 [B]Seconds:[/B] 30

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$56,745.00

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Days: 1004 Hours: 0

Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

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7566

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189,150

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1073

Dearest Lady! It is your home and your children's home. While I don't advocate ultimatums, it is okay to tell someone they can't smoke in your home. Wait till you are calm and just tell him what you just said here. You are no longer willing to have smoke around you or your children, that you are willing to support him through his quit if he will (and if you are willing!) but if he won't quit then he has to move. Tell him you love him and do not wish to watch him kill himself. ~huggs and a prayer~ [color=Purple]~lbugg~[/color]

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$56,745.00

Amount Saved
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Days: 1004 Hours: 0

Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

Life Gained
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7566

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189,150

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1073

Now you got it! ~hugs~ And sometimes our only job is to plant the seed, sometimes we get to water it. When we are truly blessed, we get to watch it grow. But we need to listen carefully to understand what our job is... [color=Purple]~lbugg~[/color] (too often I think I need a hearing aid :p ) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 363 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 19,241 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2395.8 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 35 [B]Hrs:[/B] 8 [B]Mins:[/B] 43 [B]Seconds:[/B] 32

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$56,745.00

Amount Saved
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Days: 1004 Hours: 0

Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

Life Gained
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7566

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189,150

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1073

Lady, There is always hope....always. Faith is hope. [color=Purple]~bugg huggs and a prayer~[/color] [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 362 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 19,237 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2389.2 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 35 [B]Hrs:[/B] 8 [B]Mins:[/B] 30 [B]Seconds:[/B] 21

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$56,745.00

Amount Saved
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Days: 1004 Hours: 0

Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

Life Gained
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7566

Smoke Free Days
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189,150

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2462

Lady, we all tried to quit before our final quit. If I had gone from 2 packs to 2 a day in a week or two, I would have been very proud of myself. He must be proud too, and you should be proud of him for trying. Rusty :)

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$60,819.20

Amount Saved
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Days: 731 Hours: 18

Minutes: 32 Seconds: 0

Life Gained
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5848

Smoke Free Days
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233,920

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2462

Lady...Cherie, and Shevie and redrosie are all so correct. Scream here, rant here, but do not rant at him. Let him know that you are there if he needs to talk, but beyond that find something else to do away from him. Love, Rusty :)

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$60,819.20

Amount Saved
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Days: 731 Hours: 18

Minutes: 32 Seconds: 0

Life Gained
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5848

Smoke Free Days
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233,920

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2462

Oh look! Only 103 more days until you hit a year! Focus on that, my dear friend. Rusty :)

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$60,819.20

Amount Saved
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Days: 731 Hours: 18

Minutes: 32 Seconds: 0

Life Gained
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5848

Smoke Free Days
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233,920

Cigarettes Not Smoked

19 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2462

Well, now you're the accountant in the house, but I did 365 take away 262 and came up with 103. I even used this fancy calculator on my new-fangled computer to be sure! :p Rusty

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$60,819.20

Amount Saved
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Days: 731 Hours: 18

Minutes: 32 Seconds: 0

Life Gained
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5848

Smoke Free Days
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233,920

Cigarettes Not Smoked

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And He Coughs Part II