Hi Maggie:  I like Teebs' idea.  Drive a little further every now and then.  When you feel comfortable with that, add another 20 kms. or so.  Each wk. practice the distance and keep adding on to it.  Don't forget to reward yourself when you feel you've mastered a longer distance.  Perhaps a relaxation exercise before going would be helpful, and one afterwards to help you relax again.  Good luck.

 

Sunny

Maggie,

 

I think doing some exposure as Josie suggested would be great for you. If you practice going over an hour from home before your big trip, I bet you'll find your anxiety about it goes way down before then. Can you schedule in some times to practice between now and then? Start out with something easier - not too far away, and with/without your family - whichever is easier. Then maybe plan some steps up from that before just jumping in to the big trip.

 

Keep posting, we're here for you!

Teebs

I get the impression that from what you say, you are living with coping skills but every so often they let you down. I think you need to go to the next step. Changing core beliefs so you don't have to rely so much on coping skills. A process of covering negative thought with positive so that when your anxiety breaks through your coping skills it will be confronted with positive thought instead of negative. A short while back there was quite a bit on this subject in the forums.

Here for you.

Davit.

Maggie!

 

What a great goal you have given yourself!  A trip for you and your family!  Have you gone through the exposure section within the program?  It may take a little bit of time, but it is well worth to reach your goals. 

 

The program advises to keep the following points in mind when it comes to planning your exposure work:

1. Learning occurs at moderate levels of anxiety and arousal. In planning your exposure work don’t make it too easy or too hard. If you pick something that doesn’t cause you any anxiety (a fear rating of 1 or 2) you won’t experience a drop in your fear rating because there's really nowhere to go.

As a result, you won't unlearn anything. On the other hand, if you pick something that causes a fear rating of a 9 or 10, it may be too difficult. Try to stay in the 3-8 range.

2. Exposure should be predictable. Plan your exposure work in advance and stick to the plan. Unplanned exposure doesn’t work well. Planning your exposure makes it a bit more controllable and a little less frightening.

3. Set a goal for the exposure that you can reach. Set a goal for the exposure session. You may want to stay in the situation for at least a certain amount of time (say 30 minutes) or experience a certain decrease in you fear rating (say go from a 7 to a 5). Setting a reachable goal will give you something to aim for. Achieving your goals step-by-step will allow you to feel good about what you're accomplishing.

4. Stay in the situation until your fear goes down. This can happen in two ways. First, if you pick a situation for an exposure that causes you a fear rating of a 4 to 8, then after an hour you should be experiencing a drop in your fear rating. If not, maybe it was harder than you thought. However, there’s another way to experience a decrease in fear, which is to repeat the exposure again and again. So for example, if your anxiety doesn't come down from an 8 in the first hour, try it again the next day. Eventually, if you repeat the experiment every day, it will start to drop.

5. If something is too hard, pick something just a little bit easier. If you end up having a fear rating of 9 or 10 try to figure out what you could do that would be almost the same but would result in a fear rating of 7 or 8.

For tomorrow, keep in mind that you have already succeeded.  Let the previous successes give you the strength to take on these future challenges.

Many here share your same driving concerns. You may want to use the site's search feature to view previous members’ experiences and discussions on this topic.

You already have a head start, you can do one hour of driving and this the beginning of the exposure therapy for you.

 

Ask questions, we are always here for you!