Thank you for the warm welcome, everyone. I already like this place!
The reason I came here was because while I have made significant progress -- I'm no longer a housebound agoraphobic and the OCD isn't all-consuming anymore -- the emetophobia and PTSD are still alive and well. I'll be more specific. I'm in the process of having much-needed extensive dental work -- a whole mouth reconstruction with dental implants. Each and every pre-op appointment has been, well, like pulling teeth haha
. Seriously though, there's nothing funny about it. It's been sheer hell because everything at the dentist is similar to what happened to me that led to PTSD. But I s-l-o-w-l-y managed to get through those appointments.
Friday was supposed to be my dental surgery. The whole afternoon was reserved for me. The whole dental team had assembled, they even brought in an outside anesthesiologist because the dentist doesn't think IV sedation will be enough given my PTSD issues. I made it to the office despite being in the throws of an extreme panic attack, flashbacks, etc., but I just could not go through with it. I was/am SO ridiculously terrified of vomiting that it's standing in the way of smiling, living, again. I feel like such a loser and so ashamed. My daugher is graduating from university this year and I promised her I would be at her graduation, smiling. I can't break that promise. So here I am.
I have been blogging about my dental journey, every step of the way, not sure if links are allowed here so I won't post it unless someone says it's okay to do so.
Anyway, that's pretty much where I am.
, Davit, juanita, ocean and all the rest! they know what they re talking about. you will usually find me ranting and raving somewhere!!
