Having only recently being returned to full time and full duties at work, I am struggling to cope with day to day pressures. I have to meet what I am perceiving as a very demanding client tomorrow (face to face) for what has been scheduled for a many hours meeting. She has inundated me with information and documents and I have reached a point where I am frozen with anxiety. I don't know what I"m expected to do and am dreading having to fill many hours with "I don't know". In reviewing what she has sent me, I don't know what I"m supposed to be looking for and am feeling a bit hung out to dry.
I also know that if I just keep moving forward, I'll find little clues and make progress but I need to move out of the freeze. My vision was actually clouded earlier by the intensity of my panic. Drinking a series of strong coffees only confirms my negative dependence on the bean. I need to really calm way down if I am going to make it through today and not freak out prior to this meeting. I also know that the anticipation can be worse than the actual event, and use that knowledge to counter the building panic.
I can see that getting clear of coffee, exercising regularly and establishing a solid sleep routine would be excellent supports. None of which I'm practicing. At this point I'm just trying to consiously calm myself with deep breaths and commanding the heart to slow down, venting out into this forum is a huge part of my coping right at this second.
Wish me luck.
