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What?s stopping you from participating in the support group?

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What?s stopping you from participating in the support group?

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 880

This is a great question to ask...Right to the point and right on time...When I joined this site, it seemed that there was a group of very committed and very successful people who had preceded me. Initially I was appreciative of their zeal and hopefulness. It seemed to me that these folks had found this oasis in the desert and where happy to share their waters of wisdom. It was as if their own success had surprised them to such a degree that they had no choice but to pass on the good news. At the time my bucket was fairly empty. My bucket was mostly full of a sense of futility and a scary quiet voice that told me that I could never do this...

I suspect that I am not alone in this. I found that the very act of writing about the personal journey toward cessation was a defense against the nagging needs of the addiction. It seems to me that it still is that way. But perhaps the legacy of those original members has become defused over time. The site has grown in terms of providing many more functions. Perhaps it is time to return to first principles. Personally I am not a fan of blogs and such. I think that folks just need a forum and a location to express their personal pain and triumphs. In doing so they resonate with others. That resonance tends to create bonds between people and those connections are the real life blood of the site.

Addiction isolates people and causes them to fear that they are weak and alone. When people express their pain others become aware that they are not alone. Perhaps for the very first time...

stay well

nonic

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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 218

Thanks for your feedback everyone,

All comments are helpful and guide us when making changes.

Have a good one

Matthew - Health Educator

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 52

I know what Ashley said is correct b/c in April I'll have 17yrs of sobriety & I in the beginning I was going to 3 aa meetings a day & put myself in a rehab facility and participated 500%. And quitting smoking seems to be harder but in the over-all picture of it all, it just comes down to learning how to deal with my emotions without the use of alcohol or nicotine.

I haven't been in here for week 5 of my quit b/c I was trying to just "be a non-smoker" & not think about "the quit". But I've had a few difficult times recently so thought I'd better get my butt back in here. Although there have only been a few posting in the forums, it's helped me tremendously!! I'm thankful to the oldies & the newbies for their encouragement & honesty. When I was on the site before,,,a few yrs ago (I quit for 1yr 4mos) & there were tons of people posting. I'd stay in here all day posting with people. Lolly was one of those people :)

This time it seems very surreal to me that I'm actually quitting. I've surprised myself b/c even though I'd been thinking seriously about quitting again I hadn't set a date. But in the back of my mind I was thinking I'd quit when I ran out of cig's. So on the evening of the 16th of Feb I was down to my last few cig's and all the sudden I remembered...the 16 was my ex boyfriends b-day, so I thought it was a good idea to quit on his b-day. So right before midnight I sucked down the last little bit really fast and it was really nasty. So when I think about "giving in" I think of how nasty it was that night. There really is no good reason to ever start again b/c smoking will NOT change the situation but only make it worse. It is very difficult to let that "instant gratification" go. I wish there was a such thing as healthy ciggaretts LOL I'll end on that funny thought.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 618

Hi y'all,

It's a very different SSC from the one I joined more than 8 years ago. It seems to me there are fewer members now....I don't know! I do hate being the last in a thread to post...I always say to myself, "Well you killed that one stone dead Carol." LOL!

As with many old timers, SSC played a huge part in my quit, and I do hope more people will find out just how helpful it can be. Now there are blogs on site, it may be a factor.....I never read them. Knowing how the site works is always useful, and as an oldie, I had great fun with that.

I do hope the site continues and goes from strength to strength. I suspect this may just be a quiet time in its existence.

Love Lolly.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1140

Hey Sly,

Thanks for the support on my postings. I am glad if others can get something out them.

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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1140

Original Post by: VIV
Interesting! My reluctance to get involved relates to the difficulty I have in understanding the way these things work. I have for instance found this posting simply because it was the last posting. I agree that the links made here provide great support and if sustained will help to bring us success. During the past five weeks that have have been coming here it seems to have got quieter. I have been getting the impression that I am one of just a handful of people at the beginning of their quit with a handful of successful old timers who keep encouraging us on. So if you have any tips on how to use this better, let me know. Having re read the previous comments on this thread I think I'm getting it now.. Talk on here and not to yourself in your blog or daily checklist! Is that right?

Yes, VIV,

You will defeinitely get more interaction on the forums than on your blog.

Yes, it does seem that we have a small group of new quitters and a small gorup of older ones who stick around. I'm not exactly an older one, since I'm still under the 1 year mark.

I think there is a natural tendency to fade away as smoking has less and less of a pull over time. That is a good thing. None of us wants to spend the rest of our lives being obsessed with smoking or not smoking.

I also think it was very helpful for me to post a lot as a new quitter. It's also helpful now to post when I notice something going on internally during the process. Things like how my thoughts have changed, feelings (both good and bad) that have unexpectedly emerged, etc. For me, it just feels good to have some form of self expression and acknowledgement from others on some of this stuff. I've noticed that one of the oldies, nonic, still comes on once in a while with a post about thoughts and feelings over quitting.

The other function is to reach out when you are having those craves. One time, I simply came on and asked people to give me some reasons to stay quit. It was during a moment of wekaness, and a couple of oldies came on and gave me some good mental arguments to beat back the desire. Of course, I also had to wait for the responses before fidning a cigarette. That took a while, and the craving passed. And I had some good arguments for the next time.

...I kind of think those reasons are what the support group is for. So, I'm hoping that others can get as much out of it as I have.

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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 186

Yes it has become quieter,I am hoping it is because people are doing well with their quits and not that they have given up.

I don't see most of the names that were here when I first joined.I do not post as much as some as I have a bit of a hard time expressing myself.

I am thankful to those that are so good at posting , its never to much Working On It, Always enjoy yours.

Posting is definatly a good thing ,the responses let you know your not alone , guide you and give you great support.

N.O.P.E.

Sherry

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

Interesting! My reluctance to get involved relates to the difficulty I have in understanding the way these things work. I have for instance found this posting simply because it was the last posting. I agree that the links made here provide great support and if sustained will help to bring us success. During the past five weeks that have have been coming here it seems to have got quieter. I have been getting the impression that I am one of just a handful of people at the beginning of their quit with a handful of successful old timers who keep encouraging us on. So if you have any tips on how to use this better, let me know. Having re read the previous comments on this thread I think I'm getting it now.. Talk on here and not to yourself in your blog or daily checklist! Is that right?

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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1140

Good question. It has been exceptionally quiet here for the past few weeks.

I think I have posted a lot here over time. Sometimes I wonder if it's too much. I'm kind of embarassed to see my name on so many threads, especially if it is the last name on the thread. Some of the random threads that I start or jokes that I make are actually an attempt to stimulate some conversation. I strongly suspect that many of us have experienced similar thoughts and emotions during the quitting process. So I figure why not start some conversations about those thoughts and feelings. But it's kind of discouraging when there are so few responses.

I have also been fading away lately. Part of it is that I am literally thinking about cigarettes less and less. I also sometimes get triggered a little bit when I hang out too long on these boards. I'm still checking in, reading, and clicking those support buttons several days a week. But since there is less interaction, I am posting less.

I'm kind of hoping that some of the newer (and possibly shyer) folks would post a bit more. There are a great number of people here who will emerge and respond when you post. I'm one of them.

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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2778

Hey Ashley!!!

This is a great question and I would really love to hear everyone's answers! Participation on the Forums here was a HUGE part of my successful quit! I know that a lot of veteran quitters monitor the Forums daily and are always ready to lend support and advice. We all know what our new quit buddies are going through... we've been there and done that.

Participation builds camaraderie which often lasts a lifetime. Reading and posting questions or offering support to your fellow quit buddies is also a great distraction when the nico-demon is tapping you on the shoulder!

The benefits of participating are many... so what is stopping you?

Jim

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