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Outlaw,
Aww, Man. HAPPY DANG BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I want to tell you that your post always help me out and encourage me. I think, you are very brave and strong in faith and strength and I really admire you.
As for friends, well, mine do not understand either. They still want to go party and all but first, I do not party anymore (not like they do) and I don't drink to get drunk.....gave that up for God. I have learned to just love them, accept them and pray for them. They do not understand me and that is okay.
Happy Birthday Outlaw! :8|:
Don't beat yourself up about the birthday party! Sometimes we can handle things and sometimes we can't. That's just the way of our lives. Realize that your friends and family are only upset because they can't possibly understand what you're going through and they get frustrated becaused they love you and want you to get better. People get frustrated because they can't fix it for you. I used to get sooo depressed when other people would get frustrated with me but what I am learning from the Panic Program offered on this website is that this can only be fixed by ourselves. No matter how many good inentions are out there, it has to come from within - we all have it within ourselves to fix this. It takes a lot of hard work and determination but I know we can all do this! Use the program offered here if you haven't started already. It teaches CBT, which is the most effective way of beating this. It is free.
In my own experience, I have learned that the best way to get people to understand your limitations and to help them not be so frustrated with you is to be as open and honest with them as you possibly can so they can understand as much as possible without actually experiencing this themselves. Your loved ones want to understand, but they can't unless you help them understand. Talk to them and explain as much as you can so they can at least start to understand - at least enough to give you some slack when you need it without making you feel "less than."
I hope that helps. Enjoy your birthday as best you can! You've survived another year - that proves you are stronger than you feel! :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
[b]A Birthday Prayer[/b]
[b]For You[/b]
[b]And I asked the Lord above[/b]
[b]To keep you safely in His care[/b]
[b]And enfold you in His love~[/b]
[b]I did not ask for fortune,[/b]
[b]For riches or for fame,[/b]
[b]I only asked for blessings[/b]
[b]In the Saviour's Holy name~[/b]
[b]Blessings to surround you[/b]
[b]In times of trial and stress,[/b]
[b]And inner joy[/b]
[b]To fill your heart[/b]
[b]With peace and happiness.[/b]
[b]By:Helen Steiner Rice[/b]
Well its now Sunday and its snowing in chitown lol..im 26 years old i liked 25 better..but really i liked 20 that before my anxiety started..i need you guys i had a horrible day,my gurlfriend had set up a surprise party for me months ago i found out about..ok i embarrassed but you people only understand..well i didnt want them to see me like this so i talk to me on the phone still but i dont kick it..its crazy they still love me..one like homie i misss u and cryed a few months ago..he just thinks well he moved on..well to be short i grew up the thug life type of way..but i got some real cool friends out of it some are gone who knows where,others in jail,others changed like me..well here i am 26 and they havent seen me in months so they wanna come kick it like we used to..so my iold lady promised she would cancel it she lied and thought it would help me..i went nuts,and finally she squashed the plans shes like i just wanted to see you live a normakl life she was crying and so was i..finally i feel asleep i woke up like man,i miss my boys but i cant hang out like this they would know and they wouldnt understand...i have pride left and i would rather not let them see me like this right now..i need meds im going to take them after i get the house situation figured out i promise..i miss u guys i pray for u guys..im so upset with myself i let my lady,friends and most important i let me down..pray for me im 26 today and it only 2 hours in..well i guess i will go to bed sorry about the rant..
outlaw
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