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Sorry that you feel that way today. I get like that myself. Everything is under control and I feel like I'm making headway and then, BANG, everything changes and I start hating myself for letting things get me down. Remember, though, EVERYTHING CHANGES, it always gets better!!!! You know yourself that tommorrow you may feel fine again, even if your circumstances haven't changed. Hang in there, so many of us understand how you feel. You are in my prayers.[font=Comic Sans MS]Text[/font]
I haven't had that many personal relationships since my panic attacks and agoraphobia are that bad. & When I 1st started having them as soon as I go stay with some of my family I find out my girlfriend cheated on me. When I stopped drinking myself to death to try to cure them just about all my so called friends went away too. I don't even have a car. Even if by some miracle I ever got one I'd probably panic myself to death & crash driving. I barely even know if I have a place to live anymore or what's going to happen in my future. All I kinda really have left is family (& I don't even really know if I can count on them anymore which I hate doing but they have no clue what goes on in my head & how severe my symptoms are. I FINALLY went to college for a semester(Couldn't believe that) & I felt better cuz I guess I finally had the balls to go even though I did panic in college... I got good grades but I dropped last semester....now I'm even worse I'm completely losing it!! I just rode a BIKE a few miles to get a pack of cigarettes about a 1/2 hour ago, Only 1 customer in the store I was panicking in the store and around it , could barely even speak straight to the cashier, my whole body became tense & still is even typing this now. I don't even feel alive anymore. I really have no life at all anynore period. Nothing's going right for me anymore. I don't know what's going wrong with me anymore. I am worse then i ever was. I lay in bed too alot & feel guilty when i do too.. 5 YEARS. That's alot better then 5 months ain't it? It's getting me so mad & depressed to see all these people my age & even younger have JOBS, CAREERS, OWN HOMES, HAVE LIFES , HAVE FUN & be SUCESSFUL. I had alot going for me & I feel like I had so much potential but this condition literally DESTROYED ME. I try my my hardest & it seems like things go worse. All I can do is pray & keep having faith. To me only God knows what goes on in my mind & what's going to happen in my future...
So no you are not the only one by far.
& My prayers go out to you & everyone suffering from this NIGHTMARE!
I'm sorry to hear about the rough time you're going through right now. My prayers go out to you. Try not to focus on the negative aspects of your life and declare to yourself that you won't let these setbacks set you back!
In one day the bottom fell out on me. I was doing better, I really was. After being laid off for 5 months I'd been offered a job (with a raise), personal relationships were going well and it seemed like everything n my life had stablized. Then...
The job offer was revoked through no fault of my own.
Major problems with the house and the car
Plans to go home for the holidays fell through
Gave myself a black eye (because tht always looks good in an interview)
The only reason I got out of bed was because my boyfriend needs the sleep and my tossing and turning was waking him up. All I want to do is stay in bed and feel sorry for myself. It really feels like the world wants to keep me beat down.
Please tell me I'm not the only one this happens to.
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