It's my second day in my third or so attempt to quit :) I kind of hate this time because this is the time where I believe in my will power. I start to throw out all ashtrays, lighters, buy teeth whitener, and see my future life as healthy, running marathons, with the occasional triathlon. Of course I hate this time because I start to feel I am too smart, too intelligent, too strong to start again. AND then.... I start again, that has been my past experience, and that is why I hate this time. I can deal with the symptoms, but it is the eminent failure that scares me now. I have the tendency to be good for a week or so, and then out with friends I have one, and then two, and then the next week I am smoking again. It is hard, because right now I am so pumped to quit. I know how much better I will feel, how proud of myself I will be, that I no longer participate in a habit I am ashamed of. I am scared of doing the same thing and forgetting all the benefits when out with friends, or dealing with a stressful situation, losing my brain one more time.
I hope I can do it this time!!!!!
