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sushik
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sushik
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18 years ago 0 140 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey Rainne - if she's such a brat, you certainly don't want her to take the credit for making you smoke, do you? Take a couple of those proverbial psychological deep breaths and stick to your guns. Don't let her get to you. Your plan to start off with her being self-sufficient is good. Don't be afraid to remind her who's house she's in once in a while as well. And maybe she won't enjoy her stay as much, and decide to find accommodations elsewhere sooning than you're imagining. Good luck, and take care, sushik [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/31/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 56 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,422 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $504 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 52 [B]Seconds:[/B] 15

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PrincessC
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PrincessC
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18 years ago 0 1128 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I agree totally with Breaking Free. I dont understand why you would want to start smoking though as you dont smoke. If you think the situation really will be that bad then suggest she stay somewhere else, tell her its not an appropriate time for her to be staying with you at the moment. I think you are having memory triggers of her last visit and your coping mechnisims back then were to have a smoke so you have trained your mind that in order to cope with this situation you should smoke. You are not that person you were back then, take a deep breath, close your eyes and picture you taking control of a potentially stressful situation WITHOUT smoking. Confront your fears, you really dont want to come as far as you have all over someone else's behaviour do you? Think of ALL the reasons you have quit and hold them dear to your heart. Stay strong, stay quit. You know you can do it :) N.O.P.E [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/11/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 15 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 364 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $153 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 35 [B]Seconds:[/B] 9
down
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down
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18 years ago 0 3131 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Congrats Rainy 57 days wowie . Don't let anything ruin your quit you have worked too hard for it. And by the way don't smoke it's bad for you ;) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/13/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 43 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 659 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $172 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 9 [B]Seconds:[/B] 42
Rainne
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Rainne
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18 years ago 0 73 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
At day 50-something, and I feel like if I'm going to lose this quit, it will be now. My sister in law is coming to stay with us for....oh, I don't know how long because she's 100% incompetent and couldn't make a plan to save her life. She's rude, inconsiderate, and immature. And I think she'll be here for a while. To give you an idea of how bad she really is, she's not allowed to stay at her own parents' house. So here she is, with me. She stresses me out so badly. Deeply...like the worst anxiety, hopelessness. The nicodemon seems to be biting back right now, telling me that I will feel better with a smoke, more in control. Frustrated!!! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/30/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 57 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 867 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $199.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 3 [B]Hrs:[/B] 15 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 42
Rainne
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Rainne
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18 years ago 0 73 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thank you so much everyone. I sometimes feel so alone in this, like there's nobody else in the world who could understand what happens to your mind when you quit!!! But then I come here, and you guys make it so much easier, make me feel more sane lol. I just wanted to thank you all so much for the advice....you're right PrincessC....I don't smoke anymore! Why didn't I think of that before!! I think sometimes I forget that I'm a NON SMOKER!!!! I don't need nicotine to get me through anymore! Her plane lands at midnight. I will not be staying awake to wait for her to get here. She's a big girl, she knows where the key is. There will be a note regarding my schedule for the next day, as well as where the dishes and cups are. After that, I'm sure she'll be alive when I get home from work. I think you're all 100% right...I need to set strict boundaries and stik to them. Thanks! I feel better already. :blush: [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/30/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 57 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 868 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $199.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 3 [B]Hrs:[/B] 15 [B]Mins:[/B] 9 [B]Seconds:[/B] 37
Free
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Free
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18 years ago 0 3368 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Let us know how it goes. If you need us, we are here. And don't forget the most important thing ... You chose not to smoke. (((hugs))) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/12/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 75 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,276 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $300 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 13 [B]Seconds:[/B] 58

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    $54,943.20

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    Days: 6057 Hours: 8

    Minutes: 2 Seconds: 58

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    45786

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Free
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Free
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18 years ago 0 3368 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Rainne first off ... it sounds like you need one of these: [IMG]http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a17/Daniwiz/bearhug.gif[/IMG] Your sister in law has to take responsibility for her life, just like we all have to be responsible for our quits. I would lay down some ground rules as it is your home. You and your husband are doing her a favor. I hope she appreciates that. If it becomes apparent that she doesn't she should very quickly be respectfully put in her place in my opinion. Do not ALLOW her to stress you out. We teach people how to treat us. Know your personal boundaries. Be comfortable with them. Make people aware of your personal boundaries and do not allow them to be crossed. If they are, address it immediately. If she can not respect those boundaries, then she should be made to leave in my opinion. It is YOUR home. And do not listen to the junkie thinking, it is a waste of time. Smoking has never solved anything. If it did, we'd all be smoking and have world peace. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/12/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 75 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,274 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $300 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 4 [B]Seconds:[/B] 27

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    $54,943.20

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    Days: 6057 Hours: 8

    Minutes: 2 Seconds: 58

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    45786

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    137,358

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lauren
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lauren
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18 years ago 0 610 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Rainne, After you make it through this "visit" from your sis in law, your quit will be all the stronger. You will have proved to yourself that mentally you can handle even the most difficult of people without having to smoke! Stay strong. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/25/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 63 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,704 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $236.25 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 11 [B]Seconds:[/B] 16

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    Days: 6057 Hours: 8

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Josie-Health Educator
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Josie-Health Educator
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18 years ago 0 12049 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Rainne, Talk this through! It is your house so your rules :) Take the time to make the rules and show them to her, if she wants to stay she will respect these. Protect your quit at all costs, have your coping mechanisms ready and step away from situations if necessary. You are in control and have the upper hand over the nicodemon, never let that go! Keep Strong, Josie _____________________ The SSC Support Team.

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