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Reality hits home


15 years ago 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Goofy,
 
I just read your post and wanted to congratulate you for getting back to work.  I'm sure they missed you.  Take care and keep us posted.
15 years ago 0 1693 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
You are right goofy, your post should have been posted in the successes...because this is a HUGE SUCCESS!
Good for you! Do you feel proud of yourself or what?!
It sounds like you are doing great things and are working very hard, teaching can be quite the challenge!
Hang in there goofy, and keep up the great work goofy  You are definitely on the road to success
 
Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator
15 years ago 0 1044 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
well, it's been two days.  I stayed all day  both days (should be posting this in successes).  I don't know how I'll be toward the end of the week, not predicting, taking it one day at a time.  Klonopin helps Rose, tea does too and occasionally a bit of chocolate! 
It wasn't as bad as I thought.  Being around the consumers (clients) has been fun again.  I taught a class today, though they restructured my job while I was gone (ain't that lovely) and I no longer teach any classes.  This is okay, though I thoroughly enjoyed teaching the class.  lol, I was good at it too.  
I took all the expression of sympathy and didn't lose it (Yeah!).  I've done bunches of paperwork that no one else knew how to do but me.  I'm teaching someone else for the future (hope they don't need to use it). 
I've asked to work a 4 day work week.  Before all this came up with dad, I was working OT most days, so I will get one day off a week and this will help me take care of grandma, her stuff and some of dad's stuff.  I'm going to start next week, providing everything works out!  
I'm going to PT for my shoulder and it's almost miraculous!  Not really, but it does feel better bit by bit, I can be sitting still and it doesn't hurt! 
I am still fearful of going back where I came from, but not so much.
 


15 years ago 0 201 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
goofy, easing back into work is a good thing. i have to ease into everything. takes me forever to get going in the morning. paper, coffee, shower, takes forever to wake up, wanna stay in bed! hope today at work is going well for you and you reward yourself tonight for a job well done! you could still string some lights - there's time! soak in a nice hot tub with some tea and klonopin  hang on tight to that edge, don't let anyone push you over
15 years ago 0 1693 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goofy,
 
Glad to have you back and thank you for the update!
 
Going back to work sounds like it will be just the diversion that you need.
 
Please keep us posted on how you are doing. We are here for you!
 
 
Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator
15 years ago 0 1044 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Okay, I'm losing it, or lost it, or something.  I kept checking e-mails and kept thinking "I'm forgetting one".  I couldn't remember what it could be, after all, I checked hoo, IM, g-mail, home mail, what could it be.  geez, it was you guys.  Please don't take it personally, I mean I was charting my moods in my calendar and doing session 4 stuff, but I couldn't remember when I was on-line.  WOW!  I knew something very important was missing.  I doubt I can catch up on a week's worth of posts especially going back to work. 
 
I went and talked to psychiatrist on Wed.  He suggested I return to work part-time and work my way up to full-time between now and January 12th.  I am going back to work tomorrow.  I dread it and look forward to it.  Though the depression hangs on tightly, I feel somewhat better knowing I'm going to have a diversion!  I'm also afraid of the stress, I feel on the verge and don't want to get pushed over the edge.  You know what I'm talking about....
 
My brother and  I did as much paperwork as possible without the will probated so we are awaiting that.  My son is handling that, a perk of an attorney for a son.  I've tried to help my grandmother as much as possible.  It is so sad to see her so very sad.  I got to babysit this weekend and two friends came over this past week.  I couldn't believe it, no one has been here in months and I must say I was quite embarassed by my dirty house, but so glad to have visitors!!!!

I guess that is my update for now.  It feels quite good to be taking a break from all that!  
15 years ago 0 823 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Glad to hear from you Goofy.
 
It's great to see that you are going to be taking a break............it is a painstaking task and emotionally draining I am sure. It is encouraging to see that you have some pleasant memories to draw from and can remember your dad in such a special and happy way.
 
Good luck with the PT and try not to over-exert yourself.
 
 
Faryal, Health Educator
15 years ago 0 1044 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Well, I managed to go to the gynecologist today.  argh, he said you wanted to talk to me about the cyst in your ovary.  I said NO, your nurse practitioner said I needed to talk to you and scheduled this appointment.  He said it is nothing to worry about.  Then he said, You are not menopausal.  Remember the test we did in April showing your hormone levels were normal.   I said well, why did my gynecologist of 28 years tell me I was menopausal 8 years ago, discuss my symptomology everytime we met, treatment options and put me on HRT.  He said that is because hormone levels flucuate from day to day and we just get a day's reading when we do those tests (did he just contradict himself?)  I said well, I think I do better on the HRT than without and I know the risk and I want to take it.  I need to get a different gynecologist, the one of 28 years retired last year and referred me to this goofball!  ARGH!
Then - since I fell for the third time on my shoulder, I decided to go see the general pracitioner about my shoulder.  I will start PT Wednesday, gave me a topical anti-inflammatory and said to quit falling on it (lol, I love her sense of humor).  I hope this fixes it and I get my ROM and strength back.  
I then went to my parents house where my brother had taken everything down from high storage places and we started making piles of neither of us want this, one of us want this, throw this away.  I could tell it was taking it's toll on him, we quit after a couple of hours.  We decided we were in too big a hurry, couldn't manage to "take anything home till after Christmas" and to chill out!  I liked that.
However, he was getting the last thing down from the attic when I got there, I said what's that, he said I don't know, a cutting board or something.  I knew it looked familiar to me.  I just couldnt' recall.  Later he said, if you don't want this, I do.  I said what is it? He said it's dad's drafting board!  geez, was he intentionally lying or what.  I think he lied to me about the gun cleaning kits too.  But what am I  to do?  I then think it's only stuff, what does it matter.  But no one wants to feel slighted.  
The fun part: picking up something and me or him saying, remember when we did this or remember when dad or mom did this or that.  Something would jiggle our memory and we'd have a good laugh!  
Anyway, we are gonna meet again on Thursday instead of everyday this week.  And try to rearrange furniture to get boxes separated!  There are 104 built-in cabinets throughout the house, they are all empty, including the attic.  So stuff is everywhere!   
 Thanks for the support, I wish I could say that I'll be okay with all this, but I am sure you will hear from me again. 
by the way, I don't want to go back to work!  
 

 

15 years ago 0 1693 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
goofy,
 
You are going through a lot right now, try to take it easy and take some time for yourself. Set aside an hour in your day for you. Have a bath, watch a movie, go for a walk, or just relax. As you know, we're always here for you. Hang in there, and keep us posted on how you're doing.
 
Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator
15 years ago 0 201 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hey goofy, yep - it's like you've been hit in the gut and it still aches and will for some time. i can't imagine how you two will sort things out - when my grandparents died, there wasn't much at all - i got some tea cups and a set of coffee cups with pinochle cards on them - we loved that game and played alot. when my husband's mom died it was all handled very well i think, the oldest kid 1 of 6 took care of all the paperwork and arrangements, everyone got together and they began with #1 choosing something, then #2 - down the line. there was no hard feelings, everybody got something to remember her by and the rest was given to goodwill. is there a rush to sort this out? if not, do it when you are ready, if your son is buying the house everything will be there, right? don't let your brother bully you - maybe you should up your anxiety meds right now? help get you through all this, you should just be resting and not running your brain round and round like a hamster on a wheel. relax

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