You’re not alone. 411,000+ real posts from people who showed up for each other. Read a thread, share a win, leave a tip - your words could be the nudge someone needs today.
Keep the faith so to speak and find out what works for you. That means trial and error. Learn from the past but do not become it's prisoner. It sounds like your getting stronger and stronger with every step you take. Way to go !!
As I am new here and just started my own journey so to speak there isn't a lot of insight I can give you but know that I am hoping you achieve your goals both short term and long. We gain strength from adversity, it just sucks while it is happening.
If I can help in any way, reach out, as a group we are stronger.
Yes, when we are resentful, our mental faculty can't think sanely. All we are focused is on the relief. And booze gives that. But unfortunately our body wants more and more. Thats the vicious cycle. In the midst of working the resentment there is a statement- "When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically". So when we are not resentful we have a clear idea who we are, we know alcohol will not help and what it would do to us. There we will be no need to take a drink. Thats a great promise.
I am on the workshop pages on YouTube on the Big Book. Lots of insight there for sure on what makes us drink. And I know now looking back that I was self medicating for years with alcohol. Alcohol was my medication (poor choice of meds).
You may recall back in August I posted on here and asked about resentment, and using alcohol to deal with resentment. That’s what I was using alcohol for. Thats where I have to work on myself. I am working on letting go of all that crap now. And I’m not going to use alcohol to treat myself anymore. I got a lot of work to do.
You are not alone. We are dealing with mind. And the mind has its own momentum. One day it will surrender and the other create doubt. "Am I making a big issue out of a small thing"? I am sure it happens for everyone but for people of our kind, its fatal. What clinched the deal for me is, those workshops on Youtube on the big book. There are concepts so new to me then. The spiritual malady part, never understood that. But then this guy talks about how pissed he would be in the morning restless, irritable disconnected but later in the afternoon, he is a 7/11 with a six pack, and people in front him, he even lets people to cut the line, because he has his medication in his hand. Ever experienced that? I could totally relate to that. I was using alcohol as a crutch. Peculiar mental twist was another thing i never understood. But the stories in the chapter More About Alcoholism are to illustrate that. Take a deep dive into the book. Just that chapter see if you can relate to the man of 30 story, the car salesman, the account story. They also have a parable using the Jaywalker.
I think I’m going to get a Sponsor. If I talk to some friends of mine, I’m actually afraid that I’ll scare them off. Someone who has been there I can understand better - at least that seems to make sense to me right now.
I can tell you, this is my first firm commitment to a permanent stop. The other stops were open ended. This one is not. I feel like I am done with it 100 percent this time. However, if I have a moment of self doubt going forward, I feel like I need someone to bounce things off of - hands the sponsor idea.
I am leaning toward trying a sponsor. It seems like talking to someone who has been there will understand better. Like I said earlier, I don’t think someone who hasn’t struggled with drinking can fully understand. Thanks again
Yeah, the primary purpose of having a sponsor is to have a guide to work through the steps. He/she will help you with his/her experience and also guide to other people who might have gone through the same situation we have been in. As we work through the steps, we will face lot of questions, issues and we can run it by them. We may build a good bond with the Sponsor or we could just use them as a person who will help us attain the state where we no longer driven to have a drink. If it doesn't work out, we should always be able to find another compatible person. Thats why some groups call it a temporary sponsor. See the term powerless over alcohol, if you just look at it superficially wouldn't make sense. But with a person who has gone through the book can point out the true meaning of that. Is it just losing power after taking that first drink? Or is it about not being able to stay away from that first drink is true powerlessness? We can look at our own history, we all made firm resolutions before. That oath perhaps was firm 1 day, few weeks or even months....but something happened that led us to that first drink. Thats where the book talks about the peculiar mental twist. There comes a moment, where our mind is so focused on the effect produced by alcohol, we dont look at the consequences, all the sober time we had under our belt is gone. We pick up.Thats true powerlessness.
It’s been a while since you were active on this site. Please extend your session below
You have been logged out due to inactivity.
Please sign back in.
We use cookies to help us learn about how our platform is used and how we can improve your experience. To
learn more please see our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.
