What a strong reply to your addiction....you gave it Hell in a positive way, and are prepared to fight to win! This will make you stronger. You will win!
Well, I'm certainly giving myself a hard time, but I'm not beating myself up in a negative, self-defeating way. I think if anything this is making me all the more certain that quitting is what I really want and that I'm going to fight for it.
And I think you SHOULD beat yourself up - for a bit - learn from your failure - then dust yourself off and start again - with gusto!!
You may think I am being hard, I'm not, I'm being realistic. Nobody said this was easy and if you want to quit you cannot afford slips. We had a quitter here some years ago who will tell you today that she has been quit 8 years, despite openly admitting to slipping on many occasions. She didn't get it and she still doesn't. She continues to fool herself but nobody else. I include this anecdote, not because I liken you to her, I don't, I respect you too much, I include it to show how that little voice on the other shoulder can defeat you if you are not strong.
All that said LT, I think you are strong, I want you to succeed and I will continue to help and support you to achieve your goal. Yes, you can do this!!
I can think of stronger words than stupid! I'm not one to pat heads and say "There, there now." I say pull yourself up and get into a more positive frame of mind, and look at why you smoked...What excuse did your addiction give you to say it was OK to deliberately pick up a cigarette and light it?
When I was near the start of this quit, I got as far as putting it in my mouth, then I stood crying and arguing with my addiction for a long time before running the cigarette under water. I never reached that stage again. In future, I hope you will be prepared for whatever could make you do what you did!
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