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i think my new relationship started this anxiety and depression Im in.

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i think my new relationship started this anxiety and depression Im in.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

Hello babbi,

I have some information to share about my experience. I after 5 years started a relationship with someone in July of last year. I go through (still today) questions, I get insecure, think it's unfair to ask someone to put up with my depression, etc. However, that is his choice. I discuss my insecurities with him, he reassures me. If you need alone time, assert yourself. Meet your needs and let him make his decisions. If he loves you and you can't give that back right now and he's still around, that's his decision.

There's a list of 10 questions the moderators give us and is in the sessions, I wish I had them memorized, unfortunately, my depression effects my memory. It is asking what's the worst thing that can happen, what if works out how you want it? whats the worst thing if it does turn out? Stuff like that. It is very good to help me make decisions, which is also effected by depression.

I know I have other emotional issues to contend with and sometimes devote my therapy to issues with my insecurities and doubting my relationship. This guy is not like anyone I've ever seen before either. I find it hard to believe I deserve to be treated this way. That I deserve to have a relationship like this. I do, you do, we don't have to have relationships that are not healthy. If this is healthy relationship and he's not abusive, using illicit drugs, etc, and you LIKE him, don't discredit him. Decide what is best for you, but don't make his decisions for him.

LOL, I tell myself the above things, almost everyday. I ask myself those questions and sometimes get overwhelmed with anxiety on how it will effect my depression if/when things go bad.

I agree with what others said, just sharing my experience and what I have to be careful of - not making his decisions, not second guessing whether or not I'm worthy of a relationship like this, can I handle a relationship like this, can I express myself good enough to let him know what my needs are, don't make decisions for him (I know I keep saying that but when we feel like we don't deserve something because of things that we've been through in the past, we often feel undeserving).

Okay, enough said, just my experience, hope it helps in making your decisions.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Hello babbi,

If you are feeling very depressed and experiencing some emotional problems you can definitely speak to your psychologist about this. Ultimately, you'll have to decide what is best for you in this situation and make a decision that will better your health and happiness. We are always here to support you, check in soon!

Samantha, Health Educator

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2

Hello,

thank you for your answer. Yes im really confuse, im thinking if i let him go, will i feel better, cause ive felt depress before and i didn't know him. I know im having emotionnal problems and don't know what to do, how to understand them and go on with my life in a positive way.

when he tells me he loves me, i can't say the same thing in return. Im so depress that i feel like i can't love anybody. I need to love myself first. He might love me, but when you didn't have love in a really long time and when i was younger, it doesn't repare all the sadness i had in my life.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

Salut Babbi.

I do not have answers for you. But I want to let you know that whtever you choose, you will have the support of this forum!

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11214

Hi Babbi,

Thank you for sharing this with us. It sounds like you are very confused. I am not sure the right answer to tell you. You need to to really think what do you want? There are risks in every choice we make. But many people say you cannot get what you want in life without risks.

What it all comes down to is, what do you want?

If you could talk to yourself 10 years from now what would your future self say to you? What would she say would be the right answer? Regardless of the outcome of the relationship.

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2

Hello everybody,

i speak french but i will try my best to write in english.

I met someone at work, im his supervisor. At first, i didn't want a relationship with a man at my job but he looked very serious in his interest for me, so i decided to take a chance. After the second week, i started having panix attack. (i have history, not my first time). He's a good man, always here for me, im not use to so much attention from someone. Usually i need more from a man but this time it's different, he's really there for me. I have been so deceive in my past relationship and went to some trouble one that im scared of love and prefer staying single for the fact that i don't wait for someone to make me happy and because im insecure, i dont get that feeling of asking myself where he is, what he does, whit who ... With whis new relationship, i don't have insecurity because he's always there and when im scrared of something he reassure me. I think he's doing too much. I can't give him back the same thing, for me its too intense, too fast. I have nothing bad to say about him. My psy told me im having anxiety attack and depression followed... because its was too much emotion for me, that it can't be true (in my mind) that i don't understand this kind of love because i never had it before. usually in my life, when im sad or having short time depression symptom, i isolate myself. But him, he wants to be there, so even if i wanted to be alone this past few days, he wanted to sho me that he wants to be there for me and that he loves me even if im depress.

I don't know my feelings for him, if i really wants to be with him or if i love the way he takes care of me. I think i can't make a relationship work till i get some therapy but he says, why ? Because your sad, no one will love you ?

What do you think ? Should i run from love like ive done for the past 2 years or should i face this possibily that he might be the one for me and i deserve some love in my life.

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i think my new relationship started this anxiety and depression Im in.