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It was working, I think

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It was working, I think

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11213

I am sorry to hear that. It is hard for people to understand sometimes. But you know that it is not as simple as "be a man" and we know that too.

I know you miss them. I remember when you first started posting here. You have come so far in such a short time. They will see the results and maybe they are not ready to talk to you but I am sure deep down they are proud. You have gone through so much this year and look at you now!

If you could have seen yourself this successful a few months ago would you have believed it?

We are going to be here for you every step of the way Lance.

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 194

Another thing I just realized is for as long as I can remember, I have always tried to live up to other peoples expectations that I dont know how to live up to my own. I dont know what they are. I dont know how to live life on my own.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 194

They feel you should be able to be strong, to "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" "be strong" "be a man" "snap out of it" etc. etc etc. and the criteria for going "home" to them is being off meds. In the past there was bad experiences with meds. My first diagnosis after my first panic attack about 8 years ago was the panic and depression. Thus was prescribed SSRI's, after time I resumed alcohol use and the combination was bad, Hence my first diagnosis as bipolar and meds for that which this diagnosis i rejected and stopped taking the mood stabilizer. This created more bad results for me and my family. It was all a mess for a long time, It was a struggle for me and them. So I understand why they have a med issue, but they dont understand the fact that you have to be on the right ones and Its hard to figure that part out. A lot of bad things happened. I never tried to hurt anyone and I love and miss them very much.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

Lance, I don't consider your venting here - whining, I don't think you should consider it whining either.

You have quit smoking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????????????? WOW! Congratulations and what a huge accomplishment! I can understand your frustration with the medication but look at what you've gained by not taking all those horrible toxins into your body, limiting your lifestyle, your activities, your longevity, your body is healing from the inside out. I am so envious of you and your being able to quit smoking and being able to handle all these other things.

Combine the two - quiting smoking and handling issues with the meds - WAY TO GO!

Weaning off medications - argh, I think it depends alot on what the medication does for me. I know I've not weaned off one medication for anxiety or depression that has been easy and not without issues. However, I was able to consult with my pdoc as these issues arose and decide to continue to wean off them, slow down on how fast, or whatever options. I think my pdoc input made things easier and let me know what to expect and what to do if issues arose. I think it's important to be informed of what to expect and watch out for - it makes it easier for me.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11213

Don't be embarrassed! You are still doing great. After all you have been through you are still going strong in your quit! That is nothing to be embarrassed about. Besides, the SSC members are very understanding. I know they would never think differently of anyone just because they were going through a rough time.

Also, you are not a crybaby. It is good that you come here to vent. It is a very healthy coping mechanism, nothing to be ashamed of.

I can see you are frustrated about the meds. Talk to your doctor the next chance you get. Maybe now was just not the right time but I don't think that means that it can never happen. There is no need to rush these things.

Why do you say some of your way of thinking was put their by family?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 194

It is a good learning experience and I makes me realize how good I was doing. At the same time It bums me out a little that I have to rely on meds to live. I dont like to feel that way, I know a lot of feeling this way was put in my head by family. But they dont know what its like to be the way I am.

If meds can save your life and you cant do it yourself, then I guess you should take them and be glad its available.

I am such a crybaby at times like this, but life is so overwhelming right now. I was so happy at SSC, welcoming the new people, now im whining. I almost embarrased over there right now. I was doing so good.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11213

Lance,

I know you are feeling bad now. But know we are here listening.

You should be proud of yourself. You tried to wean yourself off and that's great. It is ok that you are just not ready for it yet. Keep in mind you are still quitting smoking, just on your first month! That is a lot for your body and mind to deal with already. Like i said before be easy on yourself and relax. You have accomplished so much, don't let one bad weak make you forget how much you have already accomplished. When you feel better how do you think you will look back at this time?

Members, please share your experiences weaning off medication.

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 194

This is kinda from my first thread I started. I tried weaning off mirtazipine and after a few days just started feeling bad. I went back on and after 2 days, still am pretty messed up. Slept till 12:30. Didnt do anything I had planned this week, Im a mess.

Strange dreams, hopeless thinking, fear feelings, anxious thoughts are all back, just like that. Why? I just want to be normal and not rely on meds. I always wish I knew what happened to cause all this. A long time ago I used to be able to to anything and I was never on meds. Now if Im not I CANT function. It sucks.

I was at a point where I was doing so well, actually making progress and now Ive had a set back. I know its not the end of the world and in a few days I should be feeling better, but when you have a set back like this its scary.

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It was working, I think