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trying to stay in the present

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trying to stay in the present

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 955

Great to hear that you are writing down your thoughts, and challenging the negative ones!

Keep up the great work. Please keep us posted on how you are doing

Sarah, Health Educator

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 32

Rosie I am only in session two but I learned from other resources about challenging negative thoughts or 'cognitive distortions'. I've been writing my thoughts down for about two days now and WOW it's an awful lot of negative stuff. I believe it can only get better from here but to start with I need to wade through a big mess!

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hiya Rosie!

Oh staying in the Present is one of the best things! I try to practice that too. I don't know if I am allowed to write down a book name on this site, so I will gve it a whirl and hope it does not get erased. I would recommend a book called The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It helped me a lot. I intend to read it again soon!

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

Hi rosie,

as a person with an unstable childhood, I needed to predict the future to survive. My father's illnesses meant I walked on eggshell all day everyday. So this became a way of life. I expected everyone to become explosif and abusif when I did something wrong so I worried and anticipated every possible little thing that could happen every moment of every day. Hypomanic moments were great because i could feed this need with unlimited energy and Feel that everything was Right.

Otherwise... reoccuring depressions.

The past is where I stored my life lessons and my strenght. If I survived then and there, I will make it out now. The past is where I was hurt and as I search for what I need I brush-up against these thorns and cut open the same old hurts.

It is a bit of the why I still go the old paths in my mind.

But since then I have laid down new tracts. And I have had to LEARN through repetion that Je suis bonne, je suis fine, je suis capable (I am a good girl, I am kind, I am able). I have learned that What I have built since my early adulthood is an extraordinary life that has taken a great effort. I have learned that regardless of what I was told as a child that does not hold anymore. I have the RIGHT... to be proud of my Efforts, of my Mistakes, and of my Accomplishments.

and when i am depressed it all flyes out the window and my therapist needs to repete the lessons two more times

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1693

Great question Rosie!

Members, it is great to hear your thoughts and experiences with regards to challenging your thoughts. How are you all finding the program? Has anybody had any successes in challenging their negative thoughts?

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

Living in the present is something I worked very hard at doing when I studied Buddhism a few years back, and I found it difficult to really do. The past has made us what we are, we are aware of that and it is so hard to mentally abandon the parts of the past that we wish to. And the future? Alone among the animals, I think, we are blessed/cursed with a mind that is aware of the future, and aware of how our present actions shape the future, but with no definite knowledge of how they will. Fate twists and turns, by its own whim it seems, and the best action to take in the now is not always evident. That knowledge can weigh heavy.

I guess I'm just rephrasing what Mom of 3 just posted. But if you can truly apply the notion, Rosie, then it's certainly healthy and helpful.

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

I can use the part about the past being over and not being able to change it and I can see how the past drives my negative thoughts. While it is true we only live in the present at some point the future becomes present and I must live there. I can't shake the thought that what I do in the present affects the future. I know I don't have control over a lot of it, but bad decisions today become the things I cannot change in the past once I get to the future. That probably doesn't make sense as I've written it, but it is a stumbling block for me to just stay in the present.

If it's working for you Rosie I wish you well, but I don't think I know how to make it work for me. I don't know if it's a control issue or just that my view of my future is dependent on present decisions. Overall there is nothing I can do to control the world or the "big picture" so in that way it may be helpful to use staying in the present as a way to cope, but I can't make it fit overall. Maybe you only mean it in the "big picture" sense anyway.

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 142

you hit the bullseye when you said that we only live in the present - past events "trigger" present negative thoughts. i have a
really hard time with that and catastrophizing and all or nothing. but yeah, you can't change the past, you have little control over the future so try to live the best you can now. simple concept - why so hard to put into action, i wonder? thanks for the positive
advice

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

I just wanted to ask how the rest of you guys are doing challenging your negative thoughts. I am on session 5 now and doing that worksheet where you see how true your negative statements are. I am seeing most of mine are mainly overgeneralisations and predicting the future. I find the best way for me to try and get out of the spiral is to just stop for a minute and realise I am not in the future. This helps me stop and really analyse my thoughts to see where they are coming from. Some of them also come from thngs that happened in the past. I guess remembering we live only in the present is the best way for me to stop my negative spirals. Any thoughts??

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