I have been looking deeper inside myself the last couple of months so I guess I haven't been posting for quite a while but I do read posts here most every day..
I have been taking a deeper look at my life and how it is effecting me. I started to search on line for information and help hoping to better understand my feelings..
I found a book book titled In Sheeps Clothing Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People
written by George Simon Jr Phd..he is a clinical psychologist.
Anyway this book was a real eyeopener for me and reaffirmed the feeling I am having about my life and the direction it has been going in for the last several years. I have been more anxious especially these last two years and have found myself slipping into a depression and feeling angry about how I have been treated by people that I let into my life and my home over the last several years. It came to a head this summer with not one of this people celebrating my 60th birthday with me on the 23rd of August not one present plus several visits this last year from ungrateful house guests, so I started looking for answers about myself and for help to change myself and my life as it is now because I can no longer sit on my heels and do nothing to save myself..
One thing I found out in this quest and during this awakening is that I am not crazy or losing my mind and that my feelings are all valid. So for now I am still looking for answers and am working on making some changes in the way that I deal with the people in my life. First off there are some that will not be allowed in my life of house anymore and others who will have to change or leave..I am not sure yet..but things need to change if I want to live...
Change is scary for me and yes I am scared but in order to be happy I know I need to assert myself and set some boundaries in my life so that I can move on.
Anyway this is just a little bit of a update on how I've been and what I have been doing..
I have a lot to learn and am still a work in progress..
Red...