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Struggling with worry thoughts.


9 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks jd, I just wish I can remember to check my ego. One way I'd already started, is by an old prayer about humility I was given some time ago. I meditate on the need to check my ego, every day now. I can clip your response too, since it's a reminder than I'm not alone in my situation.
9 years ago 0 219 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hugs4u,

I didn't feel criticized at all. It was a reminder to me to take a breather every now and then and think of what others want. (which I haven't been doing recently) As for the swatting a person away, let karma have its own reward with that. I dealt with a similar situation years ago when my father was ill and when he passed away. I had durable power of attorney, took care of every thing down to the last detail and expenses. My siblings and there are many, wanted nothing to do with the real responsibilities of it. As a responsible adult I took care of it and left the bitterness towards them aside knowing it would eventually catch up to them later in life. I have those memories of visits to the hospital to cherish while they now have many questions about him. Let go of any thoughts about this sibling being a charmer (there's always one of those in a family unless you're an only child) and be the person you are without concerns or worries over it. It sounds to me that your head and heart are in the right place and that's really all that should matter right now while you're handling this. It's not really CBT advice, just personal experience. I hope it helps you. 
9 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Jd, I was(selfishly) only speaking of my situation. Hopefully you didn't feel criticized, since I couldn't do that, even constructively. I've admired your input to the forum recently! Getting better is a balancing act, and I'm a caregiver, who has another ball(s) in the air. There's a famous religious sister named Mother Theresa who I noticed commented on her community requiring a year off every 4-5 years, to recharge batteries. I figure I should do something like that daily, taking breaks for that balance. But it's subjective, since some people just can seem to go longer, or shorter times without seeming "breaks". What I'm struggling with is a sibling who likes to cherry pick, while I do the caregiving, while relatives side with him and his charming personality, while he basks in their warm protection. How do you swat a person away, when they're manipulative, and have mastered their craft over a lifetime?
9 years ago 0 219 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hugs4u,

Thanks for the reminder that sometimes we need to pay attention to what others want even if its not what we want. I'm guilty of this recently thinking me me me. Working hard on CBT, it slips by sometimes.
9 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
With all the time I'm spending with mom as she ends her hospital stay, I'm too tired to worry, or even cry. Little worries are easy to dismiss, with big decisions to come, and huge changes in my life. I felt so sad today, as I stared at the ground in the elevator, with some flowers from the garden, that I didn't even notice mom's helpful physiotherapist in the elevator, who was kind enough to make small talk. I didn't get home to see the overgrown garden, but for a good reason. For the second night, mom was ok with going to the hospital auditorium for some entertainment, featuring a live singer with a keyboard. Yesterday, she was okay with watching a few minutes of a movie. I have to remember the advice of the author of a spiritual book, who cautioned that it pays to pay attention to what others want, rather than what we(I) might want for them. My anxiety with social stuff blocked me taking mom there for a few moments, but I listened to her acceptance, even though I knew it would be for only 30 minutes.
9 years ago 0 219 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Today while sitting on porch in early evening before watering time for the flowers, I noticed they (flowers) were all in the shade. I looked to the shadow line and its about a foot and half more towards the north. We've lost about another half hour of sunlight as the sun is already setting here. I will enjoy the fall colors when they arrive. I have also noticed the mosquitos have lessened, but the sweat bees are plentiful. One was hovering right in my face as if to taunt me. It reminded me of  a negative worry thought. I sprayed it with my mist bottle and told it to go away. 
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
All I want at the end of the day is a cup of tea on the deck and to look at the flowers that will soon be gone. Accomplishment is reward in itself.

Davit.
9 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Davit, may be you should give to you some little rewards to make up for the long day you will have. Something you like and that conforts you.
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Jay Dee

35 years ago I knew a lady named Mary Lynn P….. Who used to build couches and cover them with sewn together blue jeans. I wonder where she is now and if she still does that. That was back when I had mild anxiety but never heard of a panic attack. They didn't come till I started spending long terms in hospital.

I find the bad children stay in the corner a lot easier if I keep telling myself that panic free is the normal, not the other way round. I'm getting good at ignoring their whining.
Tomorrow I go for my check up and I don't want to because it is a waste of a whole day. Three hour drive each way. At least I can see with both eyes now. Karin will want to shop and I'll just want to come home.
I'm harvesting the garden slowly with her help when ever she is fit to which isn't too often. Chronic fatigue sucks. Arthritis may be a pain everywhere but it doesn't put me to bed. There are worse things than panic attacks but at the time it sure doesn't seem like it.

Davit
9 years ago 0 219 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Davit,
 
If I can get to 80% panic free, my days would be better. 100% panic free and I would be relieved. I want it, and I'm working hard for it. I am so thankful for this group of members like me and the help I have got from this disorder on here. I know to expect setbacks, but knowing I can come into the forum and ask for help, gives me relief as well. That in itself helps with the anxiety. I didn't know sending my negative worry thoughts to the corner would work when I did it. I was overwhelmed by working so hard on the worry worksheets, frustrated would be the word for it, that I just did it like they were bad children hypothetically speaking. So far, so good. They're still in the corner.

I made the quilt for one of my grandsons. He is always asking what's in my pockets. He is three. I have an antique gumball machine so I always put a few pennies in my one of my pockets when I know they are coming over. He loves digging through my pockets for the pennies, so I cut up about 12 pairs of my jeans into squares, pockets included and made him a quilt out of denim pockets including front pockets. I sewed it backwards/inside out, so when I washed it, the denim would fray on the edges. It's more unique than lovely, and it has a sentimental story to it. I'm putting pennies in every pocket as well.

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