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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Signed Up Today

Hello Iddy687. I know exactly how you feel. I am very excitable and always was a celebratory drinker myself. Pretty soon I found myself drinking for any lil thing...a holiday, a weekend, end of work day and, of course, to calm myself after a bad day. Like you, I would always find myself thinking about that next drink...checking my glass against the clock to make sure I had time for one more before bar close.

Parties and trips are a really big concern for me too. I have found that if I can get myself fired up about really taking part and enjoying and even REMEMBERING the event, I'm able to enjoy myself, even if others are drinking. In fact, I can enjoy laughing at them and feeling good about being sober...although I also have a lower tolerance for the obnoxious drunk and risk friction/fights so it's nice to have an out just in case. There're so many things that I miss when my mind is numbed and I'm half concious so I'm able to really enjoy and experience more when I'm not. On the other hand, if I get worked up about not being able to drink and thinking of the good drinks and fun everyone else will be having, I have a miserable time...and have been known to give in to temptation and cause myself even more misery. I have been battling my demon for a while, with some short term successes, but more failure. I'm hoping that this website along with some other inspirational support and reading, I will be able to reach & maintain my goal.

Good luck and enjoy your vacation. You are not alone and it's nice to know I'm not either. :-)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Tuesday Support Pledge

I will! I will not drink and I will enjoy this day and I will remember it and I will love me! :-)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Drinking substitutes when out with friends that are drinking

My favorite is Diet Coke with a lil grenadine...and a couple cherries. Kinda treatin' myself but not cloudin' myself.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Entering end of workday danger zone

Stopped in for lil support and inspiration in my toolbox to get some ideas on how to shake the cravings I'm having. End of my work day and heading home to empty house. The drive is always hard to keep from stopping at the liquor store for cocktail supplies to go with my dinner. I will stop for a walk in the park around the lake instead. Sad how the thoughts just take over my head til I can't even come up with distraction ideas without help...but very glad to have that help here. I at least have confidence I can get through this evening and if I do I know I will be so happy in the morning to be able to get up for a good workout before work instead of hating myself for giving in.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

I keep failing

Hi June. I haven't been on here in a while and have fallen back into my everyday drinking pattern. I too can't have just one and my goal is to stop COMPLETELY. It is nice to have some place to go for support and to listen to others and to be able to provide that same support in return. Sometimes just a friendly ear can help so much and to come in here and read others words of support and/or need. I haven't used the online diary, but I have started carrying a journal and I agree with Josie. It really does help to write things down and just get them out of my head. I don't really have anyone I feel comfortable talking about some things with and it helps me to talk it out in there. It sounds like you have lots on your mind and I hope the diary will help you. I bet it will. :-)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

HELP, cant get satisfied anymore

Well, briron looks like I'm a lil late gettin in one this one, but I know EXACTLY how you feel. Boredom is something I really struggle with and have been losing that struggle lately...but back on track today...day 1. Much kudos to you for 2 months! ...and hopefully it's 2 months more by now! I'm signing up for a welding class this fall and hoping that will spark some excitement in my mundane weekday!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Monday Morning Pledge!

That's great news cm! That's really good to hear you have such confidence and bright outlook. I'm right behind ya on day 2. Felt amazing to wake up feelin so good this morning and using that to fuel my optimism and strength as my day goes on. Thanks for providing me with more inspiration today and check in frequently to let us hear how you're doing. :-)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Support Team

Would love to hear more ideas for those of us with no local support system. My boyfriend is pretty much all I have here and he has proven to be more of a trigger creator than support. He's gone during the week tho, and while that alone time has proven to be a trigger for me as much as him taking me to the bar, I would like to turn that time into something positive. I am plannin on taking a welding class one day a week starting next month, but there's so many days in a week!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Moderate Drinking vs. Abstinence

I sooo wanted moderation to work for me too. My boyfriend of 4 years is a drinker and much of our weekend activities have revolved around bars and have involved drinking in some capacity. I have tried many times to control my drinking, but I am one who just keeps going once I've started and more often than not, can't remember the night before when I had to be carried home. It has all but destroyed our relationship and has landed me in a ton of debt, which I have been steadily paying off with one year to go. My more recent attempts to control my drinking have been attempts to abstain which eventually turned into further failed attempts to have just a few. I have come to the conclusion that I can't be around drinkers until I get a handle on my problem and get to a point where I think I can be around others who are drinking without feeling that I need to be drinking too. A number of my friends are also problem drinkers, but they are not at a place in their life where they feel the need or desire to slow down or quit so it makes it more difficult to stick to Coke. 10 days ago, I had to break down and tell my boyfriend that I could not even allow myself to be around him if he is drinking. Until Sunday, it was looking like I was going to be on my own with that ultimatum, but we have since had good discussion and I think for the first time in my battle, I am equipped with a support system that cares about me and truly believes in me and wants to see me succeed. I have never felt more excited and empowered in my sobriety! My workouts have been amazing and I have slept like a baby every night. Sadly, this is the longest time I have gone without alcohol in probably 15 years...with the majority of the last 5-6 years drinking almost daily with very short (3-5 days) stents of sobriety.

I really hope that moderation works for you, but if you find it's not working, it can't hurt to give abstinence a try. Maybe you'll find that you like it even. Maybe it's not as hard as we think. I'm only 10 days in, but I really think I can get used to feeling this good every day! I do wonder how it will be to be around people who are drinking and I do hope I can still enjoy time with my friends and that they aren't put off with me not drinking, but I'm not going to continue to destroy my self-respect and health (mental & physical) just to make someone else more comfortable. They aren't really my friends if they aren't bothered seeing me disgrace and humiliate myself.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 79

Everyday pledge

Congrats Junebug! I feel your pain for sure. I am only on my 10th day, but heck, I made it thru 2 weekends so I'm feeling good about that. I haven't allowed myself to be around drinkers and I really don't think I am ready for that. I hope that you are able to get thru the holidays without incident and I hope you can find a buddy to go to parties and such with who is a non-drinker and can help you steer clear of uncomfortable situations and keep your mind off not drinking and focus on really enjoying the company of your friends and family. Just think how wonderful it will be to actually have MEMORIES of your times of celebration! :-)

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