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8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

reality

Hey Wanttostop,

It sounds to me like you are already on the right track. You only need to do this for yourself. If drinking is a problem for you, then you deserve a break from it.

You will feel so much better inside when you cross that line in the sand. I crossed that line nine weeks ago, after trying to quit for years. The best thing about getting away from drinking? The lows I was experiencing from drinking are gone. I thought I was getting derpessed, but I was just down in the dumps from drinking.

And finally, dont be too hard on yourself. Giving up drinking is tough. I have been extremely hard on myself the last year or two. That just made me feel worse, and made me want to drink more.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

QUIT TEN WEEKS

Hi Everyone,

I am writing this post in hopes that it helps someone, somewhere, somehow.

I quit drinking ten weeks ago, after many years of trying unsuccessfully to quit. I was at the point where I had to quit. The negative physicial and mental impact on myself, and the negative impact it was having on my family was becoming too much. I had to quit, and I'm happy every day that I did finally quit.

I used two main tools to get me over the line. I listened to podcasts from Kevin O'Hara on Alcohol Mastery. He really helped me put drinking in perspective. The second tool I used to quit was the book The Easy Way to Control Alcohol by Allan Carr. This audio book really carried me over the line when I finally quit.

This has been the best thing that has happened to me in a long time. I didnt fully realize how damaging my alcohol problem was to me and my family until I stopped. I am happier. I am calmer. I sleep better. I am less depressed/down in the dumps than I have been in years. I can drive anytime, anywhere. I am available for my kids, my wife, and my friends whenever they need me.

Alcohol wasn't giving me any benefits. Maybe some people can "handle it," but I realize I cannot. I am accepting the fact that alcohol and I do not mix. We are a bad combination. We dont work well together. We are like oil and water. And I dont miss anything about it.

I have only had one occassion in the last ten weeks where I was a bit tempted to drink. I was dealing with a very very stressful life situation. The thought of getting a drink to calm me down came to my head. That thought was followed quickly by "Imagine how much worse I'd be feeling now if I were drinking."

The only part that I am having trouble with is forgiving myself for what did to myself and my family over the last number of years when I was abusing alcohol. Even typing this paragraph upsets me greatly. I will find that forgiveness sometime in the future I guess.

Good luck to anyone trying to quit. Figure out how to silence that little gremlin that's on your shoulder telling you its OK to drink, when you know deep down its not OK for you.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

I am new here

Hey pickle,

The first step to getting drinking under control is thinking about getting your drinking under control, and you have already gotten started. So congrats on that! I was in denial about my problem for years. I finally came to terms and quit 11 weeks ago today. Best decision I have ever made.

My advice is take your time, read about different ways that you can get help in quitting, and use the one that works for you. I tried a couple different ways before I found what worked for me. But we are all different. So what works for me may not work for you. If you look around this site, you will find all kinds of different ideas on quitting.

Best of luck!

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

I am new here

Hey pickle,

Best of luck!

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

Close call!

Good job Gypsygirl! Saying no can be hard, especially early on when you quit, but believe me, it gets easier every day that you say no. You have already quit for a week, and week one is the hardest week to get through ( at least it was for me). I am now quit 89 days. Best thing ever happened to me.

You know in your own mind why you need to quit. "The lies we tell ourselves...." That you mentioned is the monster on our shoulder, whispering in our ear, trying to trick us into doing something that will hurt us. We get no benefits from drinking. None, zero, zip, zilsh. If you feel you need to quit, stay quit.

You are not missing out on anything by not drinking. In fact, since I quit, I turned the question "Why should I quit drinking?" upside down to "Why should I drink?" Its an interesting way to think about drinking. When I started examining this question, in light of the negative things drinking has done to me, I couldnt come up with a reason to drink anymore. So now that my questions about why i should or shouldnt drink have changed, my mindset about drinking has chnaged completely. I now cannot up with a reason TO DRINK.

I hope what I have stated makes sense.

Well done again Gypsygirl. And good comments Julie!

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

This worked for me

Hi Everyone,

A few of you have followed some of my posts over the last number of weeks. Thank you first for all the positive comments. Those comments help, especially on down days.

I am now quit 89 days. I have no desire at all to drink, I can honestly say.

I wanted to post a comment here regarding mindset and questions we ask ourselves. A big thing changed for me over the last few months. I had been asking myself for months (maybe a couple years actually) "Should I quit drinking? Why should i quit? Should I cut back? Should I just drink on weekends?" I changed that question in the last few months to "Why SHOULD I drink???????"

I think its a fair question to ask myself. Why should I drink? What benefits would I get from drinking? What are the pisitives aspects of drinking? Bearing in mind all the negative things that came out of drinking for me over the last number of years, I came to the conclusion that I cannot come up with a reason TO DRINK.

Now I wont lie and say thing are perfect without alcohol. Life is still happening, and theres still ups and downs. But everytime there's a down, I say to myself "Imagine how much worse this would be if I were drinking." Things arent pefect, but my life is much better with alcohol out of it.

Hope this post helps someone.

All the best

Gus

PS- For anyone who wants an extra motivator- I am down about 15 lbs since i quit drinking. And I have saved 1869 bucks so far by not drinking (frigging booze is some expensive habit! Holy crap! I almost dropped dead when I added it up!!!!!!)

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

Self talk around drinking and quitting drinking

Hi everyone,

I had written several posts on the Intro section of this site that somehow got deleted, so I had to restart a new one.

I am off the alcohol now over 3 months, after spending over a year trying to quit (and after drinking non stop for 27 years). I finally quit successfully this past spring. I am writing this in hopes that it gives someone an idea that may help them manage their drinking.

I have learned a bit about managing/quitting drinking over the last number of months. Before I quit, I had spent months asking myself "Should I quit? Should I cut back? Should I only drink on weekends? Why do I drink too much? Whats wrong with me? Why am I doing this to me and my family?" All of these questions were important questions, but they had a negative connotations around them. For me, I think that negative starting point put me at a slight disadvantage. Its like I was starting from a point of weakness right away. Its like I was at a disadvantage to begin the process.

Now that I am off the booze a few months, my self talk and questioning has changed. My question now to myself is "Why SHOULD I drink?" I think its a fair question to ask myself. "Why should I drink? What benefits will I get out of drinking tonight? How will things improve if I do drink? How will drinking today or tonight improve my life?"

Now that I have a firm grasp on the negative effects drinking had on me, I cannot come up with a single good reason TO DRINK. My list of reasons why I should not drink is very long. My list of reasons why I should drink is blank. I cannot come up with a reason to drink anymore.

It seems that this self talk is much easier than the other self talk I had when I was trying to quit. I cannot come up with a reason to drink anymore.

I hope what I am trying to explain makes sense. I know what its like to be caught in the trap of drinking too much and not being able to get out of the trap. But now that I have crossed that line in the sand and finally quit, and now that my self talk has changed, I cant find a reason to go back.

I dont know if anyone else who has managed to aquit has had a similar experience. I would like for you to comment if you have, for the benefit of others on the site.

Thanks

Gus

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

A new start for a new life

Hey Brought51,

Congratulations! You deserve alot of credit. You have gotten through week 1 already, and that one is the toughest weeks. At least it was for me.

You have so many reasons to be upbeat right now. As days without drinking continue, you will feel an accumulation of more and more benefits from quitting.Let yourself feel the benefits every day, and remind yourself how good it feels. My favorite part is waking up without a hangover anymore!

Well doneBrought 51

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

Self talk around drinking and quitting drinking

Hey Freedom,

You can listen to Alcohol Mastery either on youtube or via podcast. Also, I listened to Allan Carr's audio book Easy Way to Control Alcohol. Cost about 10 bucks. You can download it to your i pad or phone and listen to it. This book helps you think through what alcohol actually is, and what it actually does to us. Both great resources.

Gus

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

Sometimes it is really hard!

Hi Lynn and Ashley,

I would like to make comments to both of you. Lynn, I think we may have chatted through this site back in May/June 2014, when I was still struggling to come to terms with cutting/back or quitting drinking altogether.

I quit drinking over four months ago, after thinking about and trying to quit for over a year. For me, it was WAAAYYYY easier to quit altogether vrs trying to "manage" my drinking. When you quit altogether, there are no more worries like "How much am I gonna drink tonight? Will I have one or two drinks? Or will a 3rd (or 4th or 5th) drink hurt me? When will I be able to drive safely again? How hungover will I be tomorrow? What will this drinking tonight/weekend to to my weight? How cloudly will my head be for the next few days? Will I remember all that happened tomorrow? How will I get home tonight? Will my spouse be mad at me for drinking too much?" All those drinking related questions and problems disappear when you quit. All that anxiety around those issues stop. All the brain power that goes into planning that drinking is put to better use.

For me, there is a great peacefulness that comes with not having to worry about drinking anymore. I haven't had this much peace in my life internally in maybe 20 years. And yes, waking up is way better than coming too in a daze and not knowing what went on the night before.

I have absolutely no interest in drinking now. My life is so much better without alcohol. A good friend asked me a couple nights back "So, would you be interested in drinking a couple drinks in moderation in the coming months or years if you could handle it?" My answer to him is that I have about as much interest in drinking alcohol now as I have in drinking battery acid. I have no interest whatsoever in drinking. There is nothing there that's positive for me anymore. I get no benefits out of drinking. So I'm not interested anymore.

Ashley, thank you for all your wise council over the last months. I do read all of your comments, and I find them very helpful.

Have a great day everyone!

Gus

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