Hello mickyjupiter and welcome. Confused posted a great message. It's important to remember that medications should be taken as directed for a reason. By doing so, this will help to smooth out irregularities and create a balance. Support is key when helping loved ones. Try your best and be as understanding as possible, it's great that your seeking out advice and doing your own research! Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator

Hi mickyjupiter Welcome, and it's great that you found this site. The understanding and support that you're giving your husband is wonderful, as is the fact that you are educating yourself about his illness. The blunt truth is that you can't stop his vicious cycle -- only he can. He has to want to get better, otherwise you'll end up either losing yourself in his depression or leaving because you can't take any more. You are definitely not being selfish to want to have your needs met as well as his -- I think that is one of the characteristics of a healthy relationship :) Would he work on this program? It may be easier for him to do, if he's uncomfortable with working with a therapist. There's also a questionnaire here which can form a basis for a discussion with his GP. As for the medications, if his GP knows about [u]all[/u] the meds your husband is on, you'd hope that it's okay, though I certainly understand your concern. These are serious drugs and they need to be taken exactly as prescribed. I'll admit that I also let my prescription run out when I was deep in the depths -- once, and I showed up at my late-night pharmacy with some excuse for them to give me some to tide me over until doctor's hours. It happens, but it's not a good thing, because going on and off creates havoc with the brain chemicals. The upside is that you are now aware that he may need reminding to refill. My opinion: that you're the cause of his depression was probably just him lashing out in anger. He really does need to take responsibility for getting over his depression, though. Hopefully he'll be able to find help from this site.

Hi everyone! I bacame aware of this program through my work and thought I would check it out. My husband suffers from anxiety and depression. His problems/experiences are very deeply rooted and he didn't become aware that he was actually depressed until a couple of years ago. He began seeing a therapist (which was a REALLY hard thing for him to do) and seemed so be facing his emotions and past experiences but then his therapist passed away and he hasn't been to see someone since. Our family doctor has continued prescribing appropriate medication to him since. This week, my husband's medication ran out and he was really depressed but I didn't know that and I kept *****ing at him because he wasn't working this week and did NOTHING around the house, not even a special something for me for Valentine's Day. I was SO MAD and let him know which ended in a big fight with him saying that he thinks I'm the cause of his depression. I said if it's so terrible, why doesn't he leave and then he said, NO, YOU LEAVE! Neither of us left. He went to his buddy's house for a bit to cool off and came back and apologized and explained about the medication. HELP ME PLEASE! We both deserve a good life together and love eachother very much. Neither of us knew about the challenges to depression when we got married. I want to support him so much but I feel like I am the one who ends up compromising everything that is important to me, including my own sanity. I really don't want to come across as selfish but I still need to have my needs met in this marriage and he's just not able to do it sometimes because of his depression. This makes me feel disappointed and in-turn makes him feel more disappointed in himself and more depressed. The more depressed he feels, the less motivated he is. HOW CAN I STOP THIS VICIOUS CYCLE? Also, he is taking a number of medications which do help him to function in a much more positive way but his body has become to REALLY depend on them and this really scares me because it's quite a combination of anti-anxiety pills, sleeping pills, and pain medication...IT REALLY SCARES ME!!!!! I love him so much and really miss the way things once were. Is it me? Am I causing him this serious depression? I think of anyone in this world I have been the one to love him and support him unconditionally. We've been through some rough times but he is still my soul mate and I love him for ever! I FEEL SO HELPLESS!!! PLEASE HELP!!!!!