Bren.
It could be the Ativan. But it is not because your body needs it so much as want it. Ativan has a one hour half life and is out of your system in four. For what it is designed for it is great. Namely to break the cycle long enough for you to get back on track. This is why it is prescribed wrongly for sleep. It will put you to sleep but not keep you there. You are supposed to be able to sleep on your own after the cycle is broken. This does not always happen. It should not be used for repetitive things, like sleep or bus rides. For this you need a slower working benzo with a longer half life. But for a plane ride or trip to the dentist it is preferred. See this way in four hours your body goes back to it's routine. It is good for a security blanket because you don't intend to take it anyway and you can feel bad and go back to your routine after if you have to. It also works fast. But if you start to use it regularly your body builds a pathway controlled by Ativan and wants to use it. Soon you can only feel comfortable using that path way. This is dependence, not addiction but you can still get withdrawal symptoms.
Agitation, headaches, nausea and fatigue being the most common. And of course the best way to get rid of this according to your body is to take another Ativan.
You don't get this rebound with Valium or Xanax etc. because they have a longer half life and are actually milder. Fifteen minutes average to work verses almost instant for Ativan.
This information is available through any therapist and is on the internet. I put it here so you don't have to look it up and will have something to take to the doctor if you feel you want to try something different instead of toughing it out.
Again I have to state that medication is only an adjunct to help you. It will not cure you. CBT will but often it needs the medication with it till it works. Medication will keep you stable but only as long as you take it.
On the subject of drinking water. Urine should be close to clear, if it is not then you are not drinking enough water. Also it does not have to be water only, it can be tea or juice but juices can contribute to weight gain. Solids in the water are removed elsewhere.
Excessive plain water makes me nauseous and should not be done with meals because it dilutes digestion to a certain extent. For me it is best to sip the water often rather than gulp it.
I wonder how others do this.
One other thing is over-vigilance. The tendency for us with any PD to look for causes for every symptom. Some times we are the way we are just because we are. Unless it is life threatening best to treat the symptoms only and ignore it. S..t happens. Tomorrow is another day.
Sunny is amazingly good at looking at the positive, it keeps her from going to the negative and panicking. I'm not so good at this I have to admit. She also has relaxation techniques down better than me. This has shown me that although I am good and can function I can be better.
CBT does work, it works very well for us but it is on going and it takes time.
Davit.