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8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

Cant believe I did it!! One more day sober. Thats 4. Yesterday was really tough. Hoping today is a bit easier.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

Cant believe I did it!! One more day sober. Thats 4. Yesterday was really tough. Hoping today is a bit easier.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

Thank you Julie for your words of encouragment. This is going to be a tough week for me. My husband travels out of town and when he is home I am too ashamed to drink when he is around although I still manage to sneak a few in behind his back when he is not looking. I am sure he knows but turns a blind eye. Yesterday was the first day that I did not have a drink while he was out of town. I felt so empowered this morning which led me back to this site. I fear tonight not having the control to get through another night alone. I am planning to try and do something after work so that I am not home alone with alcohol. Its nice to know I am not alone Hope72. I agree with you totally. I want to stop the cycle so bad.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3

I actually prefer drinking alone... mainly because i can't stop at just one(even though that is my intention) and I figure then nobody will know how much I am drinking... it very obvious that i have no control~ i can't and don't stop till the bottle of wine is gone! waking up, apologizing, not remembering... being sooo embarrassed of your actions! it's a horrible cycle!

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 286

Just For Me,

I know the feelings you describe only too well and I too tried to quit, moderate a number of times before this last time. I did find out in those attempts that I couldn't manage to moderate, much as I wanted that to be the answer. I am on Day 138 and living proof that quitting can be done. Be kind to yourself at the beginning and do whatever it takes to quit: get outside and go for a walk, watch Netflix, read online blogs about quitting, sleep...... Get through those first few weeks and even though it seems now, that you can't make it through this life without alcohol, you will find that in actuality, life without alcohol is much better. You will get rid of all that shame, guilt and humiliation. You will begin to feel moments of real joy again.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

I can completely relate to your post. I am so tired of the blackouts but and feeling pure shame and humiliation in the morning. I am trying to reflect on those feelings to keep me motivated. So many times I have woken up with my husband not talking to me because he is so upset with what I did the night before which I have no memory of. Pretending I do remember is even worse. Hiding my addiction from the ones I love has been so hard. I find myself when I am alone I can drink without guilt. Being alone is the hardest time to fight my cravings. I usually talk myself into having just one but it never ends up with one.

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 286

Hello Just For Me,

Congratulations on your day three! I found that reaching out here has made all the difference for me. Admitting you have a problem and setting a goal is an excellent place to start. This website with its interactive toolbox and reading posts of others, I found to be very helpful. We are all in the same boat and the support here helps me to be accountable. Hang in there; you are not alone. I look forward to hearing about your progress!

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3

When I read posts I see so much of myself in other stories... today I too took that first step in reaching out... feeling ashamed and i guess just not wanting to admit it.... I find it funny how i am ashamed to admit i have a problem.. but yet, I can be drunk.. and stupid, and wake up not remembering what i did or said and hurt people i love.... makes no sense really! just excuses i guess... I hope that i can find the willpower for change, and maybe will the support of others to help through the tough time. good luck.. and one day at a time :)

8 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

Hi Everyone,

This is my first time here. I have drank for the better part of my life. Mostly everyday for the past year on and off. I have reached a point where I am sick of being sick. I'm so tired of hiding this from myself. My world is becoming smaller and smaller. I have lost all motivation to anything but think about when I can get home and have a drink. I am on day three with no alcohol. I feel great but no that this is short lived. For the last year I have tried over and over. I seem to do great till the weekend. I have never reached out for support as I have been so ashamed. This site I thought would be a great starting point for me. I want to do this for myself and not for anyone else. I think I am at that point and really would appreciate the advice on how to make it a success. My goal right now is 7 days. It seems so minimal when I read all the other success story's but I know I have to start somewhere.

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