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Tried Going back to work....didn't really work out so well...

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Tried Going back to work....didn't really work out so well...

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 15

Today I am feeling like a "fake". I feel like I should be back at work. I have been off for about a month and yesterday, when I visited my boss, I did not cry. I have been on the Ceridian program for 2 days. I am trying to fill in my Activity Schedule but I don't like filling things out by pen. I seem to be able to say things through my fingers on the computer--I have been working with computers forever and really don't know how to hand write. At the moment I don't feel like I am depressed. Is this normal? Am I really ill?

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11216

tdgirl,

Have you started working your way through the program? If so have you found it to help at all?

Please know that anxiety is highly treatable and you have the power within yourself to control if you are just given the right tools. The Panic Center program can help you with that.

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 5

Hi Ashley, thanks for responding.

If the anxiety wasn't an issue I dont' know that I would fall in love with my job all over again, but I know that I could "tolerate" it. I could do what is expected of me and do it well. But with the anxiety I feel like I'm a prisoner in my apartment. And while I love my apartment...spending 24/7 in it can get old really quickly!

The meds help with the panic attacks and alittle of the anxiety....except when i'm at work. it doesn't make sense to me.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11216

Hi Tdgirl,

I am sorry you had a bad day. Know that you are not alone. Many members here have been through very similiar situations to this. It is understandable that you would be anxious going back to work after four weeks. This program can be a great asset to you and working through it will certainly help with the anxiety.

How do you think your work life would be different if anxiety wasn't an issue? Do you think you would like your job then?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 5

Hello Everyone,

I'm sitting here alittle lost so I thought I would reach out and hopefully get some feedback or something....anything!

Monday this week I went back to work after 4 weeks off (this of course is after having a total of 12 weeks off before going back to work for 2 weeks) anyway, I work a fixed shift of 8-1 m-f. Which I will be the first to admit is great. I'm not complaining. I was sitting at my desk going through loads and loads of e-mails, I started feeling alittle anxious and alone (if that makes sense) so I took a quick break and walked around taking a deep breath. Went back and started again, then paranoia started...thinking people were looking at me..judging me...tried to ignore it but that didn't work. As i'm catching up on things i'm realizing that I've missed alot of new changes and need some way to catch up...all the while I have my manager throwing papers on my desk for me to sign and asking me for timesheets etc. I started to feel overwhelmed and had panic attack 1 of the day.

After panic attack 4 and 5, I decided to just give up and I waited out the rest of my shift in the lounge and then cried as I walked out the door. I got home and I didn't leave again until yesterday when I went to the dr. Who pulled me from work and increased my anti-anxiety meds. So now I feel like a useless overmedicated fool, who can't even leave the house.

I hate my job. It's basically a call centre. I've been doing it so long I'm wore out from it. But the money is good. Even though my husband insists I try to find something else and that my health is more important than the money...I can't see that right now...money seems to rule the world.

I think what I need is a proper back to work plan, which I can't get until my doctor to fill out heaps of forms. It seems endless and that's that.

I don't know if that has made any sense....I dont' even know what i'm asking for...hopefully someone out there can relate and maybe offer some advice.....or even understanding. Because i'm feeling pretty alone right now.

Thanks for reading

Jenn

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Tried Going back to work....didn't really work out so well...