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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Hi Rosie,

I am sorry to hear that things have been going great for you. I think it is a good idea for you to tap into the resources available to you (the counseling etc.). The CBT depression program we offer is also a great way to help you work on your situation.

As you move through the Depression Program the worksheets will change as you change. Make sure you give yourself time to do the homework properly - you know your depression best so it's really up to you to decide how often you do your homework. Take your time when you do your homework, there is no rush!

Each session in the Depression Program is based on previous sessions, and if you track your mood with your Mood Tracker (and keep notes in the spaces provided) you'll see much improvement over the coming weeks.

At the beginning of each session we give you a Weekly Review, which allows you to see how far you've progressed. We save your Weekly Review results in your Session Diary, so you will see a collection of results, which are all based on what you write in your worksheets.

CBT is a lot of work but the good news is that if you follow the program it will all come together for you as you start to feel better.

Please don't hesitate to contact us if you have any other questions or concerns. Let us know what sections are helpful to you.

Members, what sections of the program have helped you?

Samantha, Health Educator

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 85

So, things haven't been great. My husband and I agreed to start rebuilding the trust between us and he promised not to lie to me about even the smallest thing. Then he lied to me twice in 2 weeks about silly things. I don't know what to do. I feel like he doesn't respect me but I love him so much I could never live without him. I hate my job and feel like a failure. I am just exhausted with life and the constant struggle that it is. I can't believe I am only in my twneties and hate life this much. I found a place that offers free councelling, so might give it a go, can't do any harm. Just feel utterly exhausted and hopeless, like this will never pass. I've been telling myself things have to get better for 2 years now and I am just going round in circles.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 121

Hi Rosie,

I agree with Greg: "It seems to me that anti-depressants are not there to numb the pain." Medication has saved my life. It has not numbed anything. In fact, medication has allowed me to actually feel again and think clearly for the first time in a year. I would have never been able to get to a point of feeling good without correcting the chemical imbalance in my mind. For me, trying to fix this without medication would be like a diabetic trying to fix themselves without insulin. But that's just me. I have heard of people who successfully came out of depression with just lifestyle changes and therapy. : )

However, you have to decide what is best for you. Only you know what works or doesn't work for your particular situation.

Thank you for sharing. Please keep us posted!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Hi Rosie,

It sounds like you have been realizing what it is that you want, this is a positive step. Knowing what you want will help you build a path to get to that point. If you are unsure of taking medication again, it might be a good idea to consult with your doctor or health care professional. Express your concerns to your doctor, write down questions you may have and bring them in to your appointment. If you feel like you have used every resource out there, ask your doctor for other options. Things are continuously changing and there may be a new therapist, support group or resource for you too look into. Remember, the online depression program is always available, go through the sessions again if needed. Know that you are not alone, we are here for you.

Samantha, Health Educator

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 71

Yes, Rosie. I hear you. It seems to me that anti-depressants are not there to numb the pain. They are there to correct an imbalance. At least, SSRIs are meant to work that way. I know that a long tome ago I was prescribed amitriptyline, which is not an SSRI, and it did have a numbing effect, practically shutting me down. Have you tried SSRIs? Your doctor may have some things to suggest.

Greg

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 85

Anyone still reading this??

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 85

Well, I've been thinking alot about what I want. I want to work on my relationship with my husband. He is my everything and I feel like I am sabotaging this relationship. I don't want to start taking the antidepressants again- I felt so proud of myself for coming off them in the first place, I just can't move backwards. I just feel like no matter what happens, I won't be happy and I get this feeling of utter panic when I wonder if I'll EVER be happy again. I have tried so many things to find that positive person who used to love life that must still be hidden inside me, but I just can't find it. I hate my job, I have so many things I thought I would have accomplished in my life by now and haven't, I am messing up the one good relationship in my life and I feel like I am worthless and a waste of space. I read self-help books, I have seen 3 pshychologists about my issues the past 4 years, I have been on and off anti-depressants. When is it going to get better?? Am I doing something fundamentally wrong? Should I just take the drugs and numb my pain? Is there any way to get to a point where I feel good enough for myself (nevermind other people)? I feel like I am screaming and no one can hear me.....

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 85

Thanks Goofy for the advice- it did help. Went to the doc and he wanted to put me straight back on the antidepressants I used to be on, but I explained to him that I want to solve the issues, not just numb everything. He reckons I should see a psychologist and talk through my issues but that if I still feel bad while working through it I can come back and he can prescribe them for me. Am still deciding what to do. I really don't have money to see anyone right now. Had a chat to a friend whose boyfriend of 8 years cheated on her, and she suggested doing some introspection by myself and deciding what I really want out of the relationship and if I can accept what he did and not bring it up every time we fight. So I am taking 2 whole days for myself, no phone, no husband, nothing but myself and my thoughts (scary but maybe I can clear my head!) Any suggestions on what I can do to see what I really want??

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Hi Rosie,

It sounds like you have made the right decision to see your doctor tomorrow. Hopefully they will be able to assist you in working through the issues you have been experiencing. You must worry about yourself right now, you are the main priority!

We are here for you, please check in and let us know how it goes!

Samantha, Health Educator

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

Rosie, I haven't followed this whole thread so I may be out of line. I'm rendering an opinions here......

You are not responsible for anyone else's behavior but your own. Nothing you do gives anyone permission or an excuse to do something that harms you in any way. Nor should you look for a reward for doing good things. Just be you, depression, anxiety and all, work each day at getting better - some programs say - one day at a time. Try not to project into the future.

In my opinion trust, once it is breached is hard to re-establish, but it can be done. You cannot reestablish it alone with controlling behavior (if that is actually what you are doing - I don't know - you just mentioned it). He has to be willing to do his part to reassure you that you can trust him again and you have to have that commitment that you'll be receptive to his gestures and actions in that regard (all of them).

It kind of goes along with the above - you can't pull someone down with your depression. Your behavior is yours, his is his. He can be happy and you be depressed. I'ts okay.

Who can you be yourself with? I think with any of us - it's only us. People with and without depression. We have to be true to ourselves, and we are constantly changing and evolving and learning and growing and we have to see this too. I think some of us tend to focus on the negative aspects of who we are - there is so much more to each of us than our anxiety, depression, etc. We are loving caring compassionate, intelligent people (you get the idea). Don't lose sight of those aspects of who you are!

I hope you have luck with the doctor and get treatment that will help you feel better.

One more opinion, I know from experience it's hard to keep from doing it. Don't try to have a serious conversation with someone who is drinking and/or drunk. It will 9 out of 10 times end up in an argument. Save it till morning. Then start. It doesn't save an argument necessarily but you are arguing with someone more rational.

Hang in there and hope I was helpful in some way! We are here for you!

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