The thing I remember about a lot of my binge drinking is staying up until 3 a.m. and forcing myself to go to bed and then only getting 3.5 hours of sleep before having to get up and get my girls dressed for school. It was always horrible. I was still probably drunk most of the time, I was tired, nauseated, had cotton mouth and I had to act like I was fine for the sake of my children. Then after I dropped them off I would sleep the day away and wake up depressed, sad, lonely. I hated all of these things!! It was always the lowest point of my life, over and over again, and I couldn't figure out how to get out of that deep dark hole. I'm slowly working on it and it feels so good. The journaling on this site has been extremely helpful. I can vent, rage, celebrate, cry, all right there. So much better than stuffing it down inside with a bottle or two of wine.