It has been five weeks today and I wanted to share in the hopes that it might inspire someone else starting on their journey. When I was beginning myself, I found it so helpful to hear of others' successes and challenges.
Previous to this I had tried quitting a number of times and I even stopped drinking for several months a few summers ago. It was always with going back to moderating in the end. Unfortunately, it seemed to get worse after those attempts. It wasn't a terrible descent necessarily. It was more a constant thinking about drinking and then not being able to stop at one drink as planned. Sometimes I overindulged and embarrassed myself or others. One day, after such an episode I decided to quit drinking, but this time for good.
This time seems different somehow. I now know that moderation does not work for me even if I wish it did. I did have my husband as a support from the beginning. I have done lots of reading of any books and blogs that I could find. And I have used this website.
I have had moments when it has been very difficult but they do eventually pass. I tried to be ready for challenges even practising what I would say when asked for a drink or how to get around insistence to have just one. At the beginning, it was important to have a special nonalcoholic drink when others had wine but now it doesn't seem so important.
I have tried to show myself compassion as this is such a tough thing to do. I have really tried to be good to myself, to take care of myself, to give myself a break this past little while. This is something I realize that I have not taken very seriously in the past. Meditation, journalling, exercise, reading and trying to do something for myself have all been important supports.
Now at five weeks, I am beginning to do some reading about emotions and why I felt the need to drink. But I can easily say that stopping drinking has been such a freeing decision for me. I feel better physically-my skin is better, I sleep better and I have more energy. I feel better mentally - not beating myself up about my drinking and able to put my thoughts to better things. I feel better emotionally - I feel my confidence, my sense of hopefulness and my excitement about life returning.
If I can do this, so can you. Hang in there and keep trying!
