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I need help setting my goals

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 100

Geri, I'm glad you have a plan for when you come home and you know the temptations will be there. We will for sure be here, hopefully as the angel on your other shoulder! In the meantime, I hope you are able to enjoy your vacation and relax.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 30

I am going on vacation with my sister who is a non-drinker. She and I have had many discussions about my alcoholism so I won't drink and it should be out of my system. When I get back in a week, I will be on this website every day asking for help. The thoughts kick in like a devil on my shoulder and I'll need to be able to chase them away.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 100

PS... went to the doc today and she said my vomiting bloody mucus the other day was probably from burst blood vessels/strain on my stomach lining from wretching (sp?). She said that it's probably fine for now but if I keep it up I could seriously damage my stomach lining and sometimes when drinkers vomit, they can tear their esophagus and have to go to the emergency in that case. So ... that was off-putting. She offered a couple programs if I need more support abstaining and was glad to hear that I had the decision to stop and joined the site. Also getting other health stuff checked out which will be a relief to hopefully have figured out what's wrong with me gastrointestinally.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 100

Hi Jessica,

Thanks so much for your tips and for sharing your ideas with me! They sound absolutely great and I will definitely be trying similar things. I also like the idea of tricking myself if I the "quitting something I like" mentality starts to get to me. Great ideas and I'll keep you posted. Look forward to hearing about your successes too! Congrats on not drinking yesterday :)

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 77

one day at a time is a great idea and sometimes it needs to b hour by hour or whatever you need

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 61

Hi jojo,

I wanted to start by saying that I think it's awesome that you are taking control of your health and wellbeing.

Whether you choose to eliminate or cut back on your consumption of alcohol I think it's really awesome that you are taking the initiative to grab hold of the issue now rather than after it has destroyed your life and you find yourself at rock bottom. kudos to you!!!

omg the rewards can be awesome...

I bought a 40$ Dr. Schols aromatherapy foot bath with the money from the first week of 'not drinking' . I loooove it. after a long day of working I put in some epsom salts and pour myself an organic spearmint tea (lowers testosterone in women and has proven calming affects and help with compulsive behaviours ie drinking) if you chill it and add lime.. its tastes like a mojito if you prefer it that way ....this helps create a very very low cost spa night where I can focus only on me and my feelings and my wants and goals. I try touse that time to plan out what I'm going to do that week in preparation for my longer term goals while reflecting on the successes and challenges of the past week.

Whether you realize it or not your goal should be .. improved health, and if reducing or eliminating alcohol is a step in the right direction, then that's awesome, but you've only got one body you should love it. Quitting drinking is one thing .. but think of all the fantastic physical affects you'll get from stopping or reducing your drinking. focusing on the positives really helps.

I found it easier to stop drinking when I stopped 'quitting drinking'... instead of thinking of it as quitting drinking I told myself and others that I was planning to get fit and lose weight... in order to get fit and lose weight I had to cut calories and I chose to cut the booze calories.. tricking yourself can sometimes help..

congrats again on your successes so far... I look forward to hearing more about your success.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 100

Hi Vincenza,

Thanks. I am going to practice saying "no, thanks" and make sure I have access to a non-alcoholic beverage instead. I can also tell people I'm on medication that I'm not supposed to be combining with alcohol (which is actually true...). I also need to plan ahead rewards for myself, not just rewards for not drinking but for accomplishing a lot of work because in the past, once I accomplished something, I felt I deserved to veg/drink as much as I want. I need to feel like I still get a break/reward after doing lots of work - I'm thinking go to a movie, get a massage, or for more low budget times - hot bath and do my own nails, etc. Maybe a gourmet cupcake here and there :P

Royhobbs- I'm glad you've found a comfortable goal for yourself!

Dvdb- thank you! maybe someday moderation will work for me. for now, I'm going to follow Vincenza's advice and take one day at a time.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1853

Hi jojo64.

Take it one day at a time. Set short-term goals for yourself and have a plan ready as to how you will handle your triggers. Have you thought about what strategies you will use?

Vincenza, Health Educator

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 45

Hello Everyone,

After my last post I seemed to have missed A LOT! It's cool that everyone and some new members have come into the conversation. AHC forums may get consolidated into this one discussion thread for MOGAS!

Well, I've come to the realization that I cannot abstain 100% and be 100% happy. I know some people can do it and attend meetings etc, more power to them. However, I have decided to be 100% honest with myself and the people around me and see if we can come to a mutual understanding ...moderation.

One of the reasons I wanted to continue down the road of abstaining was for my fiancee, she noticed over the time I had been sober that I had some good and bad days, happy and sad etc. We talked after I had a slip up and we came to an understanding that if she's going to be with me she's going to support me in my decisions and likewise of course (she's not a drinker by any stretch) but she wanted me to know that I felt that I wanted to drink in moderation that she was fine with it as long as I didn't hide it like before etc.

So with that being said I've gone this past week and over the holiday weekend having a glass of Sangria with my fiancee for the first time, and feeling happy without having to hide or feel guilty. If I can keep this honesty with myself and the ones who support and care for me I won't fall back into the darkness of full blown alcoholism.

If I can keep that sense of sensibility and realization that it can happen at any time with a death a break up a loss of a job I will be OK. In addition I need to continue to come here and get support. This site and everyone here was a HUGE reason for me getting myself together and it's a reason why I'm still working at being sane and successful.

Thanks everyone.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 77

jojo....i too am in the top 2% for consumption and that was even though i wasnt completely honest...i admire people who can manage their consumption....i didnt for years...i accept the AA viewpoint that for me it is a disease...physically...cognitively...emotionally and spiritually...the spirituality i refer to as morals and character....i hope and wish you success with any solution you find that helps and suits you...what surprised me in AA was how young some people realized their issues and how many members were much heavier hitters than me...also when members in AA share their experience, strength and hope others can say yes...i felt like that...yes i did that...yes that happened to me...yes i thought like that...the similarities and automatic understanding of one AA to another is reassuring..much like this site..you are truly no longer alone....best thoughts for your success

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I need help setting my goals