Hi Kez,
Welcome to the site. God for you on taking affirmative action towards resolving this challenge. Post lot's and share your thoughts on how you feel and any any road blocks you may encounter. The tools are very good and making notes in the diary is very helpful. Looking forward to hearing more from you.
Cassy, great work on Day 3! Focus on this first week and let the others that follow build on your success. It's a positive force that gathers momentum the longer you keep it moving.
If I can just say something......PLEASE avoid using the word "failure". We all do this in one form or another. There is no "failure" here. The only thing using a word like that does is to negate and invalidate the courage and effort we have made and to chain us to the past. We walk forward in this together and, if someone starts falling backwards slightly then we wait up for them, pick them up if they need it and "move on". Start thinking in terms of "water off a ducks back". Yes, we learn from set backs but we never fail. Ever. If someone was suffering from depression would we ever think to label them a failure if they slipped backwards into a depressed episode? Of course not! We'd help them up, brush them off, and let them know it's ok ("Water off a ducks back. Let's move on"). When we see that this is measured in shades of grey we learn to extend and practice self-forgiveness and self-acceptance. Labelling is a profound form of dysfunctional thinking that only serves to keep us anchored in the past and keep us stagnant in the present, often in a state of paralysis. "Argue for your limitations and sure enough they are yours". Define yourself in extremes and you will go to extreme measures to alleviate that feeling and we begin to live in the cycle of the extreme lows and highs of alcohol abuse. We are naturally wired to eliminate stress and fear, that is why alcohol abuse escalates to the point that it does. It's a natural reaction that develops into a very unnatural condition. I've got good news for you......you're very normal and there is nothing abnormal as to how you got here. Time to move on.
The problem we face when we quit is we still maintain the internal self-dialogue that fuels the negative feelings and diminishes our self-worth and self-confidence. Your external reality is a reflection of what is going on inside. Maybe a better choice to describe a set back is "Well, I could have done better on THAT one!"..... And try to see the humour in how seriously we take ourselves.
Anyone who who takes on this challenge and bends to one knee to stop and take inventory on where they are and decides to make changes deserves a huge "Well done!". "Good bloody job!", at least in my books anyway. That takes huge courage and I really admire that. It inspires me to do better myself so "Thank you!" for sharing your decision.
Ya I know, a bit of rant first thing in the morning however food for thought during the day. A while back a thought occurred to me....."I find myself a curious creature, starving for knowledge in higher places while pecking at the stale seeds of my past". When this occurred to me I honestly began to laugh at the humour of taking myself so seriously, looking more like a chicken rather trying to enjoy the view from a better vantage point. We take ourselves far too seriously sometimes.
All the best,
Dave
