sorry to bust your hopes of controlling your drinking. if you are a real-alcoholic, total abstinence is the only way out. real alcoholics have no choice on how many they would drink once they put 1 drink in the body. that phenomenon of craving is only a real one can understand. then there is no defense against that 1st drink. which is the obsession of the mind. if we manage to stay away using our mind, we are usually cranky. so, to get over the spiritual malady we need a psychic change. The 12 steps of AA offers that transformation. And one has to work the steps rest of your life. Just like taking medication for diabetics or other major ailment.