I am glad you came here for support.
Depression can strain a marriage very much. Often times, the spouse of a depressed individual may feel resentful and depressed themselves due to the uneven workload, lack of emotional support, projection and so forth. When depression affects one member of a household everyone in the family suffers.
It is important to state here that the problems within the marriage are due to the depression and not due to another problem inside the marriage. It is also important to try to join forces to battle this. Try not to think of each other as the enemy but depression as the enemy. You two can get through this together. Make a plan to battle this together. Read through the program together, get counseling together, exercise together and talk openly and honestly using good communication skills. She has a right to her feelings just like you do and you both should have time to talk about how you are feeling without placing blame on each other. Remember you two are a team and you two can fight this together.
Coming here is a great start. Begin to work your way through the program. If she is willing it would be great if she could join you here. Try not to be hurt if she is unwilling to be supportive right at this moment. Give her time and patience just like you would want for yourself. Reward yourself for every success. For instance, if you complete a session in the program, if you go outside for walk, reward yourself for everything you feel is a goal of yours. Be sure to celebrate your successes with your spouse.
Have you talked to a doctor or counselor about your depression? They may be able to offer you advice or refer you to someone who can help.
What are a few first steps you can do to begin to battle this with the joined forces of your wife?
Keep posting John. We are all in this together here.
Ashley, Health Educator
