This is my first time being a part of an online support group for Depression. I am really excited that I found this website. I have suffered with severe Depression and Anxiety since as far back as the 9th grade, and I am now 50 years old. Recently, my depression "broke" after 5 long years of going through hell. I've had to be on anxiety medicine in order to cope with daily living and if it weren't for my anxiety medicine, I wouldn't have been able to do many things, or even drive a car for that matter. It's been 4 months now and I have no depression or anxiety, BUT given my history, it always comes back and this time, I am trying everything I can to not allow this to happen to me again, one step at a time. This website gives me hope in achieving that goal because it has so much information, and lessons along with homework and daily tracking of my moods. I also like the fact that I can interact with other people who suffer from the same problems as I do. In the past when I've attended group counseling, I found that to be extremely helpful and felt comfortable with the others in the group and didn't feel like I was all alone. So I am really Happy to be here and involved with this program.
I can totally relate to what you are saying. I too do not like confrontation at all, and in the past, I would go along with many situations that I normally wouldn't do if I weren't depressed. I never liked anyone being mad at me and felt very uncomfortable expressing my feelings and disagreements with what people were doing. And I wasn't very good at saying No to the things I really didn't want to do. Now I am learning to set healthy boundaries for myself and learning that it is okay to say No, and that I am not responsible for how that might make another person feel. I am only responsible for "My" feelings, not theirs. It was very hard to do at first, but it is getting easier the more I do it and I'm feeling more in control of my situations and relationships and feeling alot better about myself. I wouldn't consider yourself a wimp, and from my experience, I do believe that it is a part of depression and suppressing your true feelings. I began by saying "No" for the first time in a long time and I felt liberated even though I was really uncomfortable doing it, and it's getting easier for me as I go along and practice saying "No".
I hope that helps...it works for me.
Hang in there,
Jeannelynn
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