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4 years ago 0 1 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Severe anger and fear at the thought of quitting

I will keep this as short as possible.  I just turned 40 recently and never thought I would be smoking this late in life.  I have tried to quit several times over the years with no real success.  I get very angry without nicotine and even get angry at the thought of not smoking.  I don't like the person I become when trying to quit and this is leading to a defeated feeling and I'm ready to just say forget it, I'm 40 it's ok to let myself go.  I don't want to feel this way, but have found no real alternative to it.  I don't do well with the cheerleading and motivational platitudes.  I guess you would call me a cynic.  I don't know how to change this frame of mind.  I have been this way since I was young and honestly it's the only way I know how to cope with the world.  Any help with this strange situation would be appreciated.